A statue of Andy Murray at Wimbledon would be a catastrophe – look how Melania turned out

The new mixed-pair partnership of Andy Murray and Serena Williams has been an unexpected treat at Wimbledon this year, and the men's doubles winner now looks to the next step on his way to recover completely from surgery to the hip. Murray may never play a five-set Grand Slam game again, but he certainly seems to be a happier and more relaxed person after a forced layoff.

The All England Club says it wants to honor the former champion by ordering a statue or bust, but only after his final retirement.

Please, can not they do that? In fact, I would like to declare a moratorium on all proposals for public statues of contemporary icons.

Are statues really the best way to dignify and respect a unique talent? In recent years, statues honoring sports personalities have been totally banal and pedestrian: Cristiano Ronaldo's 2017 bronze effigy in Madeira looked more like Roy Race, a comic book footballer. The amateur sculptor Emanuel Santos has since taken another attempt, but the result was also mediocre. Elsewhere, the statue honoring Liverpool star Mo Salah has been widely compared to Seventies pop star Leo Sayer during his unveiling in Egypt at the end of last year.

Now, Melania Trump has been "honored" (carved in a tree trunk and exposed in her home town of Sevnica, Slovenia) and the result is so crazy that some consider it a sophisticated joke.

American artist Brad Downey has entrusted a local folk artist, Ales Zupevc, with the making of an effigy of the first lady using a chain saw. Wooden Melania wears the blue Ralph Lauren dress and gloves that she has chosen for the president's inauguration ceremony, an arm raised in a powerful bow. The statue might have looked like one of those raging sirens that adorned old sailboats, but unfortunately, the result is closer to the wicker man crossed with a giant clothespin.

So why not name a practice court or tea room after Murray? Rod Laver gave his name to the main arena used for the Open of Australia. This seems to be a safer choice by far.