Gender violence: what are the macho phrases …

A team of linguists studied the most common expressions used by people who practice gender violence in different parts of the world. “You are mine, no one else“,”if you are not with me you are not with anyone“,”calm you’re prettier“,”here you do what i said“are some of the most widely used sexist expressions in the world.

The analysis was prepared by specialists of the language learning application Babbel, in accordance with the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women, which will be commemorated on November 25.

“If we consider that language is the main filter through which we perceive the world, it is obvious that it affects the way we relate to each other and make judgments about others,” explained the doctor in linguistics Rita Santoyo Venegas.

The expert from Babbel’s didactics department pointed out that “the word has great power, and unfortunately there are many everyday expressions that confirm the unconscious bias that men are intellectually, physically and morally superior to women, and erode their freedom and their self-confidence. “.

In Argentina and the rest of the world, analysis of how violent men talk to their partners shows many similarities, the team of linguists said. Psychological violence is exercised by pretending to be expressions of love or flattery, “when in reality reveal the intention to have control over the other person“. These discourses are illustrated in the following cases:” You are mine, no one else “,” If you are not with me, you are not with anyone “or” Shut up, you are no longer. pretty one “.

The specialists also underlined the words “degrading a woman’s self-esteem or preventing her from believing that she can manage on her own“.” Women trapped in an abusive relationship find it difficult to break free because the abuser humiliates them and demeans them to the point of destroying the strength and self-esteem needed to break out of the relationship, “they said, and have marked as example the sentences “shut up nobody cares what you have to say“,” Nobody is going to believe you “,” here you do as I say “,” I will take care of you “and” with this character, nobody is going to support you. “

As an example in other countries, they cited: “Sei pazza, non è mai successo, ti inventi tutto” (“You are crazy, it never happened, you invent everything” – Italy) and “the women say “no” when they mean “yes” “” Women say “no”, when in fact they mean “yes” “- English-speaking countries).

Also expressions that place the victim as the person responsible for the abuse, in which cases the responsibility for the violence suffered lies with the victim, absolves the perpetrator: “look how you put me”, “you asked for it” or “they asked for it because they were dressed like that”. In this regard, in other languages ​​they use “mulher tem de se dar ao respectito”. (“A woman must inspire respect” – Portuguese), or “go under the desk” (“go under the desk” – associated with sexual harassment at work – France).

Finally, they added that fear of dying or protecting loved ones are some of the reasons many women remain in situations of abuse or avoid reporting their abusers. In this subject, there are phrases such as “I will not allow you to be with another person”, “if you leave me i will kill myself“or” if you say so, I will kill you. “

Concluding, Dr Santoyo Vanegas said that “violence begins with words. It is time to turn our attention to the discourse that often reinforces the prejudices of a patriarchal society. Expressions like the ones that come up are the first signs that determine an abusive relationship and they have to make people shine to prevent more serious events. “

With the aim of reducing violence by generating linguistic awareness, the App invites all women in the world to broadcast on social networks the sentences they have heard in first person due to their gender condition through the hashtag #LaViolenciaEmpiezaEnLasPalabras.