How to fight the loneliness epidemic

Human beings can survive three minutes without air, three days without water, three weeks without food and, according to popular survival wisdom, three months without company. Whether this is true or not, what is clear is that people need other people, and many of us are learning that pandemics can be lonely times. After months of shelter-at-home closures and orders, some experts worry about rising numbers let them feel alone, especially the young and the elderly; However, resilience is also widespread and studies of loneliness can reveal a variety of ways to combat it.

“In light of the pandemic, there are ways to increase this sense of connection or reduce the feeling of loneliness so that we can do it safely and from a distance,” said Julianne Holt-Lunstad, professor of psychology and neuroscience at Brigham University. Young. “One of the things that research has shown is that social support is extremely helpful in times of stress. “

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Loneliness is more than being alone. It’s a complex emotion. You can feel lonely in a crowded room or feel happy in your own business, and the degree of human connection they need varies greatly from person to person, Holt-Lunstad said. A useful way of thinking about loneliness, he said, is the difference between the social connection people want and what they get.

It’s a subjective feeling, but researchers have started to uncover signals in the brain that put the need for social interaction at the same level as the desire to eat. In a study published in November, scientists deprived participants of all contact with other people and then performed an MRI of their brains. After just ten hours of isolation in a lab (where they could read or draw, but didn’t have access to their phones or computers), people reported feeling lonely and wanting social interaction. When participants looked at photos of people participating in social activities, MRI scans showed the same midbrain activation as people who saw photos of food after a ten-hour fast.

“It was an incredible constant with everyone“Said Livia Tomova, cognitive neuroscientist at Cambridge University in the UK and co-author of the study.” Social interaction isn’t just fun or heartwarming. It’s something we really have need to function. ”Without this social connection, people often become depressed, which further fuels feelings of loneliness. Chronic loneliness it’s also linked to higher rates of heart disease, Alzheimer’s, suicide, and even death.

Find a friend

If loneliness interferes with your ability to function or if you think you are harming yourself, seek professional help. In the case of milder loneliness modes, decades of research suggest a series of strategies to reduce the devastation caused by closures due to the pandemic.

The most obvious strategy is to seek the support of friends. According to various studies, people with strong social relationships are more likely to live longer than people with weaker ties. Knowing that you can count on people, said Holt-Lunstad, you reduce stress. When looking for connections Focus on your most devoted friends and family.

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Some research shows that people feel more stressed and disconnected when in their networks of friends there are people who have betrayed them, who were not by their side during difficult times, who frequently argue with them or who provoke negative feelings. In other words, a call with a close friend can be more useful than a Zoom meeting with college friends. “It’s not enough to increase social contact,” said Bert Uchino, professor of psychology at the University of Utah in Salt Lake City. “You have to increase the contact in the relationships that they are important and very positive for you. I think it is these relationships that will allow people to overcome loneliness. “

Help a stranger or master a hobby

It might also be a good time to help your neighbors. Holt-Lunstad and his colleagues found that loneliness rates dropped from 10% to 5% among people who helped those who live nearby in one way or another. Research suggests that you don’t even have to know the people you’re helping. Just donating money to a good cause could helpUchino said. In a series of experiments, researchers found that people who gave money to others were happier than if they spent it on themselves.

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However, if giving makes you feel overwhelmed, it can be harmful. Instead of, Try hobbies like cooking, gardening, journaling, or listening to music. The creative arts can also reduce loneliness, and while singing in a choir in person is currently not possible, singing from balconies or through virtual bands can be powerful.

Seek help in real life

Loneliness can strike at any age, but young people can be the most affected by canceled activities and wasted social time. About 73% of Gen Z adults said feeling lonely in a survey released in October by the American Psychological Association.

Although group video calls and social media conversations have taken over the lives of many during the pandemic, they we don’t know how virtual communication affects loneliness. A 2012 study found that mother-daughter conversations on the phone or in person caused hormonal changes that reduced stress, while texting didn’t have the same effect. Heavy use of social media was associated with higher rates of loneliness.

For young people, who were already accustomed to digital communication methods, such as text messages, this can be a suitable substitute for in-person interaction. And certain types of social media use can help people feel more connectedadded Tomova, who works to find out what satisfies our thirst for social interaction the most and why.

By Emily Sohn, © 2020 The New York Times Company.