Woman, young and addicted to porn: they confess why they consume pornography

"I was very surprised, you know, to see romantic movies where people are in love and bad is totally healed, to watch …" and shrugged slightly.

Neelam soon surpbaded this first impression, as she was eating bad almost every day until the age of 16.

"I think bad desensitizes you, there's a moment when you start to see more violent things, there are not many things that surprise you."

He used to climb into his room, always decorated with posters of his favorite artists and pictures of his friends, closed the door and spent between 10 minutes and an hour to "browse the bad pages" .

• "I was curious, but I also felt very embarrbaded, as if I was doing something unnatural that normal girls would not do," Neelam Tailor

The case of Neelam is not unique. A study from the University of Middlebad (England) published in 2016 indicates that about 53% of 11 to 16 year olds were exposed to explicit material on the Internet.

For Neelam, it all started as a mere curiosity about bad.

"I think I only saw it in movies and wanted to know more.Maybe I had a high libido, or maybe it was because I was Had reached puberty … what I know is that I started looking for clbadic movies with high badual content. "

Soon, he began to consume more and more explicit content. "At school, I heard about badgraphy, but since it was a unibad bad, it was perceived as something that kids were doing. I was curious, but I also felt very embarrbaded, as if I was doing something unnatural that normal girls would not do. "

While Neelam gained more knowledge about the videos available on the network, he developed some types of tastes.

"I had the habit of looking for bad content where women were submissive, maybe stressed or as if forced to act, I was also looking for scenes of older men with young girls. "

Dominant Man Picture

Sarah *, 25, recounts similar experiences.

"I started eating bad at age 13 or 14, I did it at least twice a week … I felt I was meeting a need."

"I remember how quickly I became insensitive – I saw the orgies of 10 men and a woman, basically a mbad of writhing bodies, women who slapped or were humiliated at one time. other way – had access to all this even before having bad. "

Sarah still consumes bad "from time to time", but says that after seeing it for more than ten years, it's now difficult for her to have an bad without first having high stimulation. "like a vibrator or more bad"

• "I was scared when I noticed the differences I felt when I was watching bad and when I was having bad … I was wondering if I should go to the bathroom and to watch bad before I can annoy ", Neelam Tailor

Much has been written about men exposed to badgraphy. In 2016, psychobadual therapist Angela Gregory told the BBC that the ease with which men can access this type of content has an impact on the number of patients treated with erectile dysfunction in the UK.

On the other hand, researchers at the University of Nebraska, USA, badured in 2017 at the annual convention of the Association of American Psychology that men exposed to badgraphic material soon their youngest age were more likely to be in agreement with the image of the dominant man. and statements such as "things tend to work better when men are in charge".

Dr. Thaddeus Birchard, cognitive-behavioral therapist and founder of the first training program on how to treat badual addiction in the UK, explains that badgraphy is generally considered a man's business.

"This is partly about neuroscience," says the expert. "When women are excited, they produce high levels of oxytocin in the brain, responsible for education and human connection, while men produce high levels of vasopressin, substance of persistence and of concentration."

"It's one of the reasons men can spend hours and hours on the Internet," he continues.

Are women immune to bad?

Of the 94% of people who participated in the Middlebad university study – who confessed to having consumed this type of content in adolescence – there were also women.

More recently, the BBC surveyed 1,000 young people between the ages of 18 and 25. In this publication, 47% of women reported having seen badgraphy in the last year and 14% reported having developed bad addiction.

The reason why Neelam stopped using this type of material at the age of 16 was precisely because of the physical impact it was undergoing.

"With my first boyfriend, I realized that I could not move through real bad, bad offers completely unnatural stimulation levels, especially when you have ten open tabs (on your computer ), which human can he reproduce? "

"I was very scared when I noticed the physical differences that I experienced while watching bad and making love … I started to wonder if I should go to the bathroom and watch bad before bed, to excite me, "she said.

It was at that moment that she stopped watching him. "I do not think I was addicted just because I stopped and I never wanted to start again."

Hannah *, 28, admits that watching too much bad can lessen sensitivity, but she also thinks that being exposed to it has been beneficial.

"I am a bad, I think I thought I was attracted to women since the age of 8 or 9, but that 's only when I saw a bad scene that I' d like. said, yes, confirmed. "

Hannah says that in fact it has helped her feel better. "I was 12 years old and I was getting excited to see you could express your baduality with another woman, that was great, I think that's why I think the bad can be something positive, because if you've never seen someone like you, you may feel isolated. "

Gynecologist Leila Frodsham, spokesperson for the Institute of Psychobadual Medicine in the UK, has been treating patients for 20 years.

"I've never seen a woman claiming to have a problem with bad," she says.

Frodsham shows a pragmatic attitude to the scarcity of literature on women and bad. "Whenever there is little research in an area that you need to ask yourself, is it because women have physical and psychological problems but they do not go to the doctor?" because we're too embarrbaded to talk about it, or maybe it's because they do not really have any problems? "

Hannah continued to consume badgraphy during her teenage years, "we had a computer at home and we had to wait for everyone to fall asleep," but that eventually disappointed him.

"Most bad with bads (in the most famous places) are basically male badual fantasies about how bad between two women should be, that makes us a bad."

Over time, Neelam, for his part, asked about the number of his badual desires formed from what he saw very early.

"Little by little, seeing how women of color were being treated in badgraphic films, I started to incorporate the idea that I was something that people appreciate, a bad instead of". 39, an individual woman. "

"I was also looking for a power dynamic that I had seen for many years seeing older men with younger girls and, at age 17, 18 or 19, I started to actively seek out Older men, I do not know if it's a coincidence, I'll never know what happened first, if I had innate tastes or if bad had created them. "

Porn as escape

Other women use badgraphy not to get excited, but to escape stress and trauma.

Writer Jessica Valentish wrote her memoirs on her addiction experiences in which she describes how she used badgraphy as a mechanism to cope with the pressure of writing a book.

American writer Erica Garza, now 36, was 12 when she started watching "soft" bad on TV. It was in 1994, the Internet was still in its infancy.

"I had a scoliosis and I had to go to school with back support, they harbaded me and I felt isolated, so I used badgraphy and bad." masturbation to get away and feel good. "

Like Neelam, the stealthy experiences were accompanied by a deep sense of shame.

"Often, women do not talk about what excites them, because if they do, they can be called sluts or terrible words," she adds. "I think it is in the process of shame of our desires that we develop our compulsive habits."

Although she does not consume bad every day, Erica Garza sought treatment for bad addiction because it affected her life and relationships.

"It was something I went to when I was stressed or worried, but it kept me from participating in other activities, I started to isolate a lot, I felt bad, I thought something was wrong with me. "

"Anyone who uses bad compulsively does not really do it because of bad," says Dr. Birchard. "It does it to anesthetize a difficult state to manage."

It can be anxiety, stress, depression or loneliness. "Whether it's a man or a woman, if the function of badual behavior is compulsive, then it's about escape," adds the specialist.

However, Erica Garza thinks that there is nothing wrong with watching bad.

"It's like wine, some people can have a drink and leave it there, others have to drink the whole bottle."

"True" bad

Her experiences led her to write the book Gettin Off, which brought many women around the world to contact her.

"I think what we need is to investigate shame, it's what drives women to get caught up in their own experiences," he said.

A few years ago, Neelam tried to come back to bad, "just to see how I would react, but I did not like it."

• "I do not think I'm portrayed in conventional bad, so I'm looking for smaller, more ethical productions – that exist – or homemade videos by couples," Neelam Tailor

Hannah still sees him from time to time, but she pays particular attention to the material of her choice. "I do not think I'm portrayed in conventional bad, so I'm looking for smaller, more ethical productions – that exist – or homemade videos by couples."

For Hannah, this type of badgraphy is more realistic and exciting.

"I would never judge anyone for the bad that it consumes, but I think we should try to create more representative content," he added.

The testimonies of these women indicate that it is necessary to have a more diverse material presenting different body types and a more realistic intimacy. a more positive bad that makes bad a more fun activity and less a demonstration of resistance … how difficult is it?

BBC.