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The lines of combat were indeed drawn in the school yard.
But what is disturbing is not between the children this time, it is rather their parents who set a good example to the approach of the holidays.
Now, when Sophie * goes to pick up her children at school, she feels the waves of judgment coming from other parents. She sees moms she once considered as close friends standing on the other side of the playground, flagrantly ignoring her.
The mother of NSW lives in fear of the conflict that affects her son – that the six-year-old girl stops being invited to birthday parties and dates of play.
For her, it seems crazy that this drama began on something so small and extremely petty.
Did she usurp the president of the P & C? Nope. Did she cheat with one of their husbands? Not even close.
Sophie decided not to give money to send her son's kindergarten teacher to a gastronomic weekend in a cellar at Christmas.
"It seemed excessive to make such expensive gifts to teachers, so I said no," Sophie said. Kidspot.
As she approached the end of her son's first grade, Sophie's last concern was to offer her a present.
"I'm surprised to be part of the minority of people who think it's not normal!"
In the nursery school, some parents made gifts, but it was much more discreet, children often giving gifts to their teachers.
"If you did, then you did it. But if you did not do it – it was not the same pressure, it was not the money, "she says.
"But now, parents are under pressure to offer the ideal gift or spend a lot of money."
Sophie talks about an unexpected message on Facebook, sent in October, asking parents to donate money for a weekend to the kindergarten teacher and her partner, which consists of a gourmet meal with three courses.
"I'm surprised to be part of the minority of people who think it's not normal, the majority of people approve," she says.
"I am absolutely stunned, it's a thing at school now."
It's not that she does not think teachers deserve a gift; it's more than she thinks the parents have been exaggerated.
Not only do parents pay about $ 50 for the group gift, but Sophie adds that many also buy individual gifts, including spa vouchers, music tickets, and movie pbades.
"It's just crazy," she says. "I have never seen anything like it before. I do not know if we compete to be perceived as good parents or if they do not want to miss because of pressure from their peers. "
Sophie says that she also thinks that some parents might go too far in the gift department to give their children an edge in the clbadroom.
"I think teachers will then favor people who have offered them expensive gifts," she says.
"It's more competitive now, people want the best for their child, that is, they want the extra attention of the teacher and how to do it is to buy gifts.
If that is the motivation, Sophie is seriously concerned about the end of the situation.
"If you give it to a teacher for a year, you have to do it for the whole life of the school – and it's really expensive for parents," she says.
"I know teachers work hard, but I do not think they deserve a $ 500 bag in a spa.
"I know people who do it just to be part of the band, to be included, but I'd like to think that I'm a role model for my son."
So, despite the treatment of other parents, Sophie sticks to her arms and recently went to Kmart to buy a small gift to the teacher.
"I will not give in to peer pressure," she says.
"Gathering big sums of money, it's not giving him that experience – this joy of giving – so we got a little gift that he chose, that he can pack." and that he can give himself to the teacher.
"One should not expect that they will get expensive gifts every year."
* The name has been changed
This article was originally published on Kidspot.com.au and has been reproduced with permission.
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