Depressed mother shows a picture of what the illness feels like

Brittany Ernsperger

That's what depression looks like. No, not the clean dishes. But that has already accumulated so many dishes. I have not washed dishes for two weeks.

Three days ago, I was sitting on the kitchen floor, staring at the dishes while crying. I knew I had to wash it. I wanted it so much.

► But the depression mulled me, completely absorbed – like a black hole. shifting sands that constantly flowed

Every morning, every night, I spent dirty dishes all day long. And I watched it. Tell me that I can wash it. I told myself that I would do it. And I felt beaten every day and even worse if I did not do it again.

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Failure

This only made the depression worse because the failure to do something that needs to be done is a failure.

► Not useful. The failure. Stupid piece of shit. Incompetent. Dumb. Lazy. All of these things go through the heads of people with depression. Den.

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Then throw a pinch of anxiety disorder on top and you have a very special treatment.

that your husband leaves you because he thinks you are lazy. Be afraid to invite someone home because they think that you are disgusting.

For fear of disappointing your children – there is a pizza for dinner for the third time in a row because you do not have clean dishes to cook with. So there's pizza.

Anxiety Disorder Encourages Terrible Thoughts

And worst of all: This is not just with the harness like that. Wash, clean, dress, shower, make children, brush your teeth – normal daily tasks. Everything becomes a nightmare. The tasks become scary. Some days I can not do it

"Strong" people do not talk about their depression because they do not want others to think that they are "weak" .

► But

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You Have Been Strong for so long and had to survive so much that your body needs a break. I do not care if you just hang up deodorant today.

► I am proud of you. You did a good job. I'm proud of you. I'm on your side.

I do not want to pay attention or sympathy, in any case. I just want everyone to know that I'm here for you. I understand. If you need someone to talk to, I'm always here to help you.

Editor's note: If you feel that your life is useless, call the chaplain. It's anonymous, free and accessible 24 hours a day. The phone numbers are 0800 111 0 111 and 0800 111 0 222.

At Schatten & Licht eV you will also find more information and information. Regional contact persons for relief measures in postnatal depression. Phone number: 08293/965864 E-mail: [email protected]