In hell (and Ohio) and back to recover my Tesla Model 3

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I am not an eco-geek, but an energy-consuming head with several cars in his garage and a need for speed. When Musk introduced the 3, I coveted it as I wished for BMW, Ford and Porsche. And as a journalist, I was also intrigued by an entrepreneur, Henry Ford of the early 21st century: motivated, visionary, controversial.

Musk is also, like other geniuses of West Coast technology – Amazon's Bezos, Uber's Kalanick, Facebook's Zuckerberg – in redefining industries. But he looks more like Apple's Steve Jobs by taking a new approach to product design. In this case, the car.

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Henry Payne has deposited $ 1,000, along with another 450,000 customers, to get the first-row seat of production of the first production vehicle in the first viable automatic start of his life. (Photo: Henry Payne, The Detroit News)

With more orders for the 3 than BMW sales on 14 model lines in a year, Tesla promised not only to become a competitive luxury player in 18 months – but to mount it for delivery to its own nascent reseller network . Dude, it's a tall order.

The fires of "the hell of production" Tesla – missed deadlines, problematic build quality, tent-making – have been well documented. The hell of delivery, where customers like me interact with Tesla, is experiencing a more variable climate.

Six weeks traveled by.

On August 8, I called Las Vegas – Tesla Shipping Center – for an update. Dispatch told me that they had been overwhelmed by the orders at the end of July, while Tesla was ending the free LTE cellular service. The new cost? $ 100 a year. The proof that even people who pay $ 50,000 for a car feel the market.

But other odors sowed anxiety. On August 7, Musk tweeted, in apparent violation of SEC rules, that he was taking the company behind closed doors. Tesla forums were full of customer stories on delivery dates. Tesla HQ was a revolving door for executive departures. Then, in September, Musk swallowed the joint (intentional pun) during an interview with alcohol.

This is not the kind of news that inspires customers with $ 50,000 worth of luxury car orders. On September 17th, the call (finally, the text) finally arrived from Vegas:

Hey, Henry, this is Jackie from Tesla. I am looking for your model order 3. I am able to offer you the delivery this month. Can I schedule you for September 27th?

It was also optimistic. After a ping-pong delivery date, my kidnapping was postponed until October 26th. A Tesla subcontractor said the company was rushed to meet the profit deadline of the third quarter (September 30).

In Jersey, October 18, on the occasion of my son's wedding, I received a call from Robert to Tesla Cleveland. Can you pick up your car on Monday the 22nd? I would be there with insurance and the balance of $ 57,450 in hand.

What happened to model 3 promised, $ 35,000, affordable? It will only be delivered at the beginning of next year – baduming customers still want it after the $ 7,500 federal tax credit expires this winter.

As chaotic as delivery is, the Tesla reseller process is a model of efficiency.

Tesla has handed over the keys to the free rental of a company to make the one-way trip to Lyndhurst (outside of Cleveland) in search of the future. sustainable transportation. My turn? A Nissan Armada SUV ironic and ginormous. Half a tank of gasoline. Range: 200-something. Gas infrastructure everywhere. I did it in three hours flat.

Because Tesla dealers are factory outlets, the reseller process is a formality. All cars in the lot are spoken – delivered according to the customer's specifications. No bargaining. Indeed, to help with the floods of September deliveries, the Cleveland store has brought the current owners of Tesla to badist with vehicle control.

My salesman has spent his time explaining the technical features of the spacecraft: automatic lane change, streaming audio services, regenerative braking, voice commands. We examined every inch of the car, including construction defects (Tesla quality is still lagging behind).

Before returning home with an electric torque of 307 pounds, Tesla completed the battery with a range of 300 km. Unlike the Armada, the charging infrastructure for the 3 is in reserve.

Cooling the heels in the waiting room, I spoke to another Tesla owner. He had first contacted a Chevrolet dealer to buy a Bolt EV. The lot was littered with bolts, but he said the sellers ignored the details and did not negotiate the price.

Frustrated, he searched for Tesla online and placed his order. "It was a fantastic trip," he said.