Shameful secrets bother us more than the guilty ones

MADRID, Feb. 12 (EUROPA PRESS) –

Everyone has secrets, but what makes them think of them and another time? People who feel embarrbaded by a secret instead of feeling guilty are more likely to indulge in the thought of what they hide, according to a study published by the American Psychological Association in the magazine & ### 39; & # 39 ;. Emotions

"Almost all keep secrets and can harm our well-being, our relationships and our health," said senior author Michael L. Slepian of Columbia University in the United States .

Slepian and his colleagues interviewed 1,000 participants who asked a series of questions about their secrets and the shame and guilt they badociated with these secrets. Participants were asked questions designed to measure shame (for example, "I do not have courage and I'm small") and blame (for example, "I'm sorry and regret something that I have done").

Participants also indicated how often they had thought about their secret and had hidden it every day during the previous month. "We look at shame and guilt, the two most studied conscious emotions," says Slepian, "in contrast to basic emotions, such as anger and fear, which refer to something outside oneself, shame and guilt, focus on the self. "

FEELINGS OF VALUE AND REHABILITATION

People who said they were ashamed thought much more about their secrets than those who felt guilty or who did not. felt not ashamed or guilty of their secrets. Secret The authors also found that neither guilt nor shame predicted the concealment of secrets.

"The concealment of a secret is largely due to the frequency with which a person has a secret conversation with Slepian argues.

When a person was ashamed of this secret, she felt small, valueless or helpless, while guilt forced him in. An individual felt remorse, tension, or regret.According to Slepian, some secrets about mental health, a previous traumatic experience, or a lack of physical appearance tend to cause more discomfort, while hurting another person, lying to someone or violating someone's trust makes him feel more guilty. [19659004] Slepian finds that feeling sorry n did not think of a secret a few times in the same way that he felt powerless.Scientists point out that people should not be so hard on them when they think about their secrets.

"If the secre Do you feel heavy, try not to take it personally, but recognize that it is reflected in your behavior, and you can change it. Slepian says, "Guilt forces people to focus on what they need to do next, so moving from shame to guilt should help them deal with their secrets and go from one to another. before."