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Chrissy Teigen shared her thoughts on Instagram about being sober and not having “completely dealt with” the loss of pregnancy of her son, Jack.
“I remember New York a lot lately, when things were simple, thinking about everything I have done and experienced not just this year, but in my life. I’m a little depressed lately, ”said the author of the“ Cravings ”cookbook alongside a photo of her and her husband, John Legend, in New York City this weekend.
“It kind of started when I thought about the caption for my book and typed ‘my third baby is here !! “Like in a cookbook, then I realized my third baby would never be here,” she said.
“Then I realized I threw myself into the book to not think about the real third baby,” Teigen added. “I don’t really feel like I’ve completely transformed Jack and now that I don’t have the alcohol to numb him things are just there waiting to be recognized.” I guess what I’m saying here is that life is so complicated.
Teigen and Legend shared that they suffered a miscarriage in the fall while expecting their third child, whom they named Jack.
“We’re shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about, the kind of pain we’ve never felt before,” Teigen shared on Instagram last year. “We were never able to stop the bleeding and give our baby the fluids he needed, despite bags and bags of blood transfusions. It just wasn’t enough.
“We never decide on the names of our babies until the last possible moment after birth, just before we leave the hospital,” she said. “But we, for some reason, had started calling this little guy in my stomach Jack. So he will always be Jack for us. Jack has worked so hard to be a part of our little family, and he will be forever.
Dimitrios Kambouris via Getty Images Chrissy Teigen and John Legend attend the 2018 Glamor Women of Year Awards on November 12, 2018 in New York City.
A few months after the loss, Teigen shared in January that she chose to get sober because she was “done making fun of me in front of people (I’m still embarrassed).”
In May, the model was embroiled in a bullying scandal after Courtney Stodden accused Teigen of harassing them when they were teenagers. Teigen later said she was “deeply sorry” for her actions.
Since then, the former “Lip Sync Battle” apologized again and spoke of feeling “lost” in the “cancellation club”.
“I have to get through this, I desperately want to communicate with you guys instead of pretending everything is fine. I’m not used to anything else !!” Teigen said in a candid post in July, “Cancel club is a fascinating thing and I’ve learned a lot. Only a few understand it and it’s impossible to know it until you’re in it.”
She added that “it’s hard to talk about it in that sense because obviously you look plaintive when you’ve clearly done something wrong. It just sucks.
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