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DEAR ABBY: My son’s new wife – who has a daughter – insisted that her two children are not biologically hers. After a DNA test, it turns out she was right. They are not. My son, my husband and I are heartbroken. Her twins are 10 years old and they don’t understand what’s going on.
My husband and I try to stay nicely in their life with limited phone calls and visits. My son’s wife refuses to visit us until we stop communicating with the kids, promise never to talk about it, and won’t post any photos in our house. She also tries to convince our son to stop seeing us. What to do? – DISAPPOINTED IN TEXAS
Dear Disappointed: These children, regardless of their biological father, were raised believing that you and your husband were their grandparents. If you like them, don’t meddle with your son’s new wife or that will be just the beginning of how she tries to control you.
She does not have the right to dictate who you (or your son, for that matter) see and with whom to communicate. It also does not have the right to order you to remove an object from your home.
If your son decides to turn his back on these children, it is a decision that only he can make. If he also chooses to turn his back on you, you’ve raised a milquetoast instead of a man.
DEAR ABBY: I am married and I love my wife. We are not living together at the moment due to unfortunate circumstances.
Being away from her, I feel extremely alone. I have a colleague who has become a good friend and I have feelings for her. I told her how I was feeling and we hung out a few times – nothing sexual. Now she walks away and my heart is broken. How should I treat? I hold back my tears for someone I’m not even with. What do I do? – HEARTBROKEN IN THE EAST
DEAR HEARTBROKEN: A relationship doesn’t have to be sexual to be meaningful, and your coworker was filling a space in your life that was empty. That you feel a sense of loss and sadness at the thought of her moving is not surprising. Not knowing the unfortunate circumstances that caused the separation between you and your wife, I can only advise you to start looking for a way to mend the fences or change these circumstances so that you can live together again, because clearly, you are not doing well. yours. If that’s not possible, start to think seriously about how you plan to live the rest of your life, because that way doesn’t work.
DEAR ABBY: The other day I was on a video conference with our boss and two coworkers. When “Joan” came on the call, “something” was hanging from one of her nostrils. Maybe she had a cold. I scratched my nose and mustache several times, trying to alert him to what was going on, to no avail. She didn’t react. No one else said anything.
What would have been the correct protocol? Should I have left him alone or was I right in trying to let him know? I did what I would have done in person. Do I have texted him privately? Please advise. – TELECOMMUTING WOES DEAR TELECOMMUTING: If the person with the leaky nose had been you, wouldn’t you have wanted to know? Yeah, you should have texted him.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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