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DEAR ABBY: My 10 year old boyfriend and I recently broke up with some pictures that he showed on his coat. At one point, he had a picture of me on 8 x 10 that suddenly disappeared. He swore that he had no idea what had happened to him. He now has four photos (two out of eight out of ten) of a woman that he calls his "co-worker". She accompanies her to church on Sunday and I know she is not interested in him.
I'm not a jealous person, but these photos hurt and embarrassed me when others asked who the "baby" was in the photos. He knew my feelings about them, but did not slaughter them. It has two smaller images of both of us, but you can not miss both 8 by 10 as you enter the room.
Was I wrong to ask him to remove them? I still love him, but my feelings do not seem to matter. – PERPLEX AND HURTING IN FLORIDA
DEAR PERPLEXED: You were not wrong to tell your ex what you felt for the photos. And you're right that your feelings on the subject were not important to him. It seems that he has become obsessed with the lady of the church, which is why you decided to break this relationship.
DEAR ABBY: I have a friend type who goes from girl to girl constantly. People talk about who he is and say that he does not really like the women he is in love with. He was called desperate, among others. None of this ever happens to him. Even though we are just close friends, he even asked me to go out.
I think he's all wrong, and I want to tell him, but I know it's his life, and he'll tell me. I want people to stop talking behind their backs. It annoys me so much when it comes to his love life that I sometimes want to scream at his face. Do you have any advice for me? – GOOD FRIEND IN CONNECTICUT GIRL
Dear friend, yes. You have the right to express your opinions to your friend. That said, try to be less critical. Stay with his friend but focus less on his love life because it is not your business. You make a mistake if you allow this to become an obsession.
DEAR ABBY: My daughter says that if I send a silver wedding gift to the bride and groom, even if we have not been invited, the bride would feel guilty for not including us.
My daughter and the bride have been friends and sports teammates for 25 years. We watched it become a good person. She had a small wedding in the backyard and we fully understood and accepted her decision not to invite us. What is the correct label on this subject? – DO NOT KNOW MIDWEST
DEAR DO NOT KNOW: As a general rule, if you accept a wedding invitation, you must offer a gift to the couple. However, if you are not present and you still want to send something, it is NOT only a violation of the label, but a generous and affectionate gesture. In any case, send the check with a note expressing the feelings you shared with me. I assure you that the wife will be touched by your attention.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, aka Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby to www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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