FDA Statement on Ambrosia and Other Treatment for Transfused Young People: Nope!



Christopher Lee as Dracula.

Peter Thiel is do not will be happy about it.

Hammer films

Another sign of the Trump administration's total war against all that is good in the world, the Food and Drug Administration was directly attacking vampires. In a statement, FDA Commissioner Scott Gottlieb and Peter Marks, director of the FDA's Center for Evaluation and Research on Biologics, warned "consumers" (read: "The dreaded offspring Nosferatu, the Vampyr, responsible for the symphony of the night ") plasma infusions in young donors" (read: "plasma infusions in young donors"). Until Tuesday, the start-up Ambrosia offered a service in which she transfused a liter of young blood to anyone who felt an insatiable thirst for blood in exchange for $ 8,000, a very affordable price for technology billionaires and aristocrats miners from Eastern Europe. However, according to FDA officials, consuming gallon after a gallon of hearty and nutritious young people's blood has no medical value and may involve significant risks:

In simple terms, we are concerned that some patients may be targeted by unscrupulous actors extolling plasma treatments by young donors as remedies and remedies. Such treatments have no proven clinical benefit for the uses for which these clinics advertise them and are potentially harmful. It has been reported that bad actors charge thousands of dollars for unproven and unguided injections of evidence from adequate and well-controlled trials.

In response, Ambrosia said on his website that they had "discontinued patient treatments," which seems to really give premature abandonment, at least if you know medical research on the subject. If the FDA is so certain that plasma injections in young donors do not have any of the anti-aging benefits sought by Ambrosia's customers, how do they explain this sequence of a plasma injection in young donors dating back to 2000? ?

Comrade of Control, Drumpf. But as usual, the only thing worse than the Trump administration's refusal to accept scientific evidence if they contradict their political positions is their total lack of concern for the consequences of their reckless actions. In its statement, the FDA says nothing about healthy ways for non-practicing undead Americans to reduce their blood intake of young people, and there is no suggestion that anyone in the administration is even considering the possible danger to force them to follow an accelerated diet alone mitigate them. These risks are real: the actor Frank Langella, for example, never fully recovered from the blood donor clinical trials conducted with young donors in the late 1970s:

It's just another example of the Trump administration embarrassing to interfere with things they do not know like humans during a rave of blood. In Reagan's day, Republicans understood that the price of a liter of delicious young blood had to be determined by the free market, not by government regulators. But as we all have seen, Trump favors Republican principles only when they benefit personally. It is probably too much to ask Mitch McConnell to remind the president that he now runs a party dedicated to the idea that the elderly should feast on the blood of the country's youth. But could he at least turn the guy into a vampire? At first glance, giving Donald Trump the ability to fly, turn into bats and feast on the blood of the living would seem to be a counter-intuitive way of preventing him from causing further harm to the country or its inhabitants . But Vampire Trump would be the very definition of a short-term problem, eternal life or not. Do you remember the eclipse?

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