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FKA Twigs says she suffered from panic attacks as a result of her allegedly abusive relationship with Shia LaBeouf.
The British singer first detailed in full the “fear and shame” she felt during her nine-month romance with the actor.
And she revealed that she only had the courage to leave LaBeouf after calling an abuse hotline.
In an interview with Louis Theroux on his BBC Radio 4 “Grounded” podcast, she claimed LaBeouf forbade her from looking other men in the eye – and isolated her from friends and family.
She felt like she was ‘the worst person ever’ – and thought no one would believe her after passers-by didn’t help when LeBeouf strangled her at a gas station.
“I really felt like it was impossible to leave, I felt so controlled… it was completely overwhelming,” she said.
The couple met on the set of the movie “Honey Boy” in 2018 and separated in May 2019.
In December 2020, Twigs announced that it was suing LeBeouf for sexual violence, assault, and infliction of emotional distress.
She told Theroux that there had been “an intense honeymoon period in the beginning” before LaBeouf’s behavior became abusive.
She said that she gradually realized that he was becoming more and more “jealous and controlling”, and noticed the “little things you could do wrong that could harm your happiness.”
“For me it was being nice to a waiter or being polite to someone who could be seen as flirting or [wanting] to engage in some kind of relationship with someone else when I’m just ordering pasta and being polite, ”she says.
“I was told that I knew what he looked like and that if I loved him I wouldn’t look men in the eye. So that was my reality for four good months towards the end of the relationship, that I was not allowed to look men in the eye.
The star said she started staring at the ground when the couple dated and began to isolate themselves from friends and family, adding: ‘I was just living a very regulated and contained life which at in my opinion, caused me the fewest problems. ”
LaBeouf – who, as Page Six reports, was pulled from promotion for her latest film, Oscar-favorite “Pieces of a Woman,” following the lawsuit – also expected her to meet a quota. daily affection, she said.
Twigs said, “He said his former partner was meeting that number very well and that I was under… it was 20 touches, 20 kisses a day, reinforcements of my dedication to him and me being committed to him, this which is exhausting because you can be natural. “
“He would wake me up at night to accuse me of all kinds of things,” she said. “Accuse me of looking at the ceiling and thinking of ways to leave it, he would accuse me of masturbating … [accuse] me wanting to be with someone else – but it would still be, I would say, between four and seven in the morning.
She went through lockdown in London to try and recover, as she admitted: “For a long time whatever woke me up in the night, even if it was just my dog, or a noise outside, or just needing to go to the bathroom. , it could trigger a really intense panic attack.
She said she was’ left with [post-traumatic stress disorder] of that, which again is something that I don’t think we are really talking about as a society just in terms of healing by going out, and how much work has to be done to get back, to get back to who you were. before.
A “turning point” came when she called a helpline and was taken seriously, she said, adding that she wanted to be able to tell her daughter that she had been the victim of violence.
LeBeouf told The New York Times that many of Twigs’ allegations are not true, but said he owed him and Karolyn Pho, another woman whose allegations were in the lawsuit, “the opportunity to disseminate their statements publicly and [for me to] accept responsibility for what I have done.
In another statement, he added: “I am not in a position to tell anyone how my behavior made them feel. I have no excuse for my alcoholism or my aggressiveness, only rationalizations.
He said he “had been abusive to myself and everyone around me for years. I have a habit of hurting the people closest to me. I’m ashamed of this story and sorry for those I hurt. I really can’t say anything else. “
Page Six has reached out to LaBeouf for comment.
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