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What is going on?
It's a question I could not shake, an idea that would not leave me. I walked through the busy streets of Siem Reap, trying to understand everything, people, traffic, tourists, shops, the fact that "Pub Street" is now an artery filled with friendly drinking places, the only place in town, you could actually get a beer.
I could not find the hostel where my brother and I stayed last time, 12 years ago. I could not find the bar where we played billiards and meet these English girls and where my brother was lost for a few hours after jumping to the back of a scooter and disappeared. Of course, I did not find the two guys we paid for carrying us in t-shirts for two days. Nothing was like I had left it.
Siem Reap has changed. Over the last few decades, she has gone from a sleepy country town, a favorite stop for adventure travelers and banana pancake crowd, to become a mainstream tourist destination with an international airport, five-star hotels and a cruise port. break your heart, in a way.
Or at least he broke mine. Where was the time that I had? Where was the place where I had the habit?
I hated Siem Reap when I came back for the first time a few years ago. I hated that it had changed, the world had changed, mbad tourism had arrived and swept the sullen and English pub and the horrible sunburn we took on the boat ride from Phnom Penh and Replaced by something else. Something nicer. Something easier.
It took me a few days to understand my mistake, a few days to eat in new places, to drink with new friends and to see the temples with a fresh eye to discover what I should have always known .
You should never look back. As a traveler, you should never cling to the past. You should never be that guy who tells everyone that he should have been here 20 years ago. You should never chase away memories. Never obsessed with what was. You are going crazy.
I think it's the secret of a successful and enjoyable travel life. It's good to have memories of past experiences, but they should not inform what you see or what you feel in the present moment. At the risk of looking like one of those Instagrammers that drives me crazy, you have to be there when you're traveling, to focus entirely on what's in front of you, what makes it great, what makes it special.
Never look back. Never think too much about how a destination was in the past. Never go back to a place where you expect to live the same experience, go out with the same people, eat the same things and feel the same way back in those years.
This does not mean that you should not return to places you have loved. On the contrary: you should. One of the greatest joys of the trip is the rediscovery: discover a city or a country that already has a pbadion for you.
But be sure you revisit a place, not a memory. Make sure you do not try to recreate a vacation of the past. Make sure you are looking for something new, exciting and fresh.
Do not forget that this is not just the destination that will have changed at the time of your return. You will also have changed. You will be older (definitely). You will be wiser (maybe). You will be more mature (possibly). You will have more risk aversion (there is a chance).
A complete recreation of my first trip to Siem Reap, 12 years later, would probably have been nil. I would have been annoyed by the disappearance of my brother or sister rather than slightly alarmed and mostly amused. I would have felt too old in this pub full of backpackers. I would have missed having air conditioning in my room.
You do not do any favors while watching your past travel while you are still experiencing new adventures. The memories are for the house, when you need something to support you during another stifling work day. When traveling, you should simply enjoy what you have, celebrate your differences, treat each destination as a totally new destination, exciting and different.
If you do not think you can do it, I would advise you not to go back at all. The world is a huge place – there is always a new place. Go to these new places and enjoy them through enthusiastic and fresh eyes.
You never want to find yourself hating a place you love, just because it has changed; just because you changed. You never want to be obsessed with this question that has no answer: what is this mess?
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