Nebraska's grandmother acts as a substitute for the gay son



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Woman, newborn

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Ariel Panowicz / http://arielfried.com/

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Baby Uma Louise with her parents, Matthew Eledge and Elliot Dougherty and her grandmother, Cecil Eledge

A 61-year-old Nebraskoise expressed her joy after giving birth to her own grandchild, playing the role of surrogate mother for her son and husband.

Cecile Eledge completed the daughter of her son Matthew Eledge and her husband Elliot Dougherty, thus giving birth to the Uma Louise child last week.

Ms. Eledge stated that she made this offer when her son and Mr. Dougherty first announced that they wanted to start a family.

"Of course, they all laughed," Eledge told the BBC.

Ms. Eledge, 59 years old at the time, said her suggestion remained a kind of joke within the family at first, and not a realistic path for the future.

"It just seemed like a very nice feeling from him," said Dougherty. "It's such a selfless woman."

But when MM. Eledge and Dougherty, who live in Omaha, near Mrs. Eledge and her husband, have begun exploring options for having a baby, a fertility doctor told them that this could be a viable option.

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Ariel Panowicz / http://arielfried.com/

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Eledge and Dougherty on the day of their daughter's birth

Ms. Eledge was called for an interview and a series of tests that all gave surrogacy a green light.

"I am very concerned about my health," she says. "There was no reason to doubt that I could carry the baby."

Mr. Eledge providing the sperm, Mr. Dougherty's sister, Lea, was the donor egg.

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Ariel Panowicz / http://arielfried.com/

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Cecile Eledge and her granddaughter, Uma

Dougherty, a barber, said that while heterobadual couples could consider IVF as a last resort, they were the "only hope" of a biological child.

"We always knew we had to be unique and think outside the box," said Eledge, a public school teacher.

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Alamy

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Lea Yribe, Mr. Dougherty's sister and Uma's egg donor, Mr. Dougherty, Ms. Eledge and Mr. Eledge

Ms. Eledge said that the pregnancy was smooth throughout the pregnancy, the usual symptoms being simply "a bit high" compared to her previous pregnancies with her three children.

In fact, the most obvious sign of her age appeared less than a week after the implantation of Mrs. Eledge's embryo, when MM. Eledge and Dougherty bought her a home pregnancy test to see if the transfer was successful.

"We were told not to do it, but the boys were impatient," Eledge said with a laugh.

She examined the test and was devastated to find that the results were negative. But when Mr. Eledge came later in the day to comfort her, he saw something she had not seen: a second pink line on the test, confirming a pregnancy.

"It was really a happy moment," said Eledge, accompanied by jokes about her failing sight.

"She can not see anything, but she will be able to do her job," remember Mrs. Eledge and Mr. Dougherty.

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Ariel Panowicz / http://arielfried.com/

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Parents Elliot Dougherty and Matthew Eledge meet their daughter Uma

Ms. Eledge said the response to her pregnancy had been generally positive, accompanied by a slight "shock factor," especially for her other two children, Mr. Eledge's brothers and sisters.

"When everyone had a complete picture, it was nothing but support," she said.

But the pregnancy has uncovered persistent signs of discrimination against LGBT families in Nebraska. Although same-bad marriage has been legal in the state since the landmark Supreme Court ruling in 2015, Nebraska has no laws prohibiting discrimination on the basis of badual orientation. Until 2017, the state maintained a ban imposed for several decades on gay and bad adoptive parents.

Ms. Eledge stated that she had unsuccessfully fought with her insurance company to cover health expenses that would have been covered had she given birth to her own child. And because of a law designating the person who gives the baby as a mother, Uma's birth certificate tells Mrs. Eledge alongside her son and excludes Mr. Dougherty.

"This is only a small micro example of what creates obstacles for us," said Eledge.

Mr. Eledge made headlines four years ago when he was fired at Skutt Catholic High School after informing the school administrators that he and Mr. Dougherty were planning to get married.

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Ariel Panowicz / http://arielfried.com/

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Baby Uma with his parents Elliot Dougherty and Matthew Eledge

Mr. Eledge's treatment has provoked outrage from his community, prompting parents and current and former students to create an online petition calling for "ending discrimination in employment at home." against Mr. Eledge and his future teachers ".

The petition, now closed, has brought together 102,995 supporters.

Ms. Eledge says that they have chosen to share their story to counter these examples of "hatred" towards LGBT individuals and families, and to convey "that there is always hope".

"I'm learning not to take it personally," Eledge said of the negative responses to his family and himself. "At the end of the day, we have a family, we have friends, we have a huge community that supports us."

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Ariel Panowicz / http://arielfried.com/

Legend

The Eledge and Dougherty family on the day of the birth of Uma

And one week after Uma's birth, Ms. Eledge said she and her granddaughter were doing well.

"This little girl is surrounded by so much support, she will grow up in a loving family," said Eledge.

"That was how it had to be."

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