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Blue Origin’s New Shepard rocket heads skyward with Bezos on board.
Joe Raedle / Getty Images
Amazon founder Jeff Bezos successfully exploded to the edge of space and back Tuesday, and said the event made her “Best Day. Ever.” Bezos, his brother Marc, aviation legend Wally Funk and Oliver Daemen, 18 flew on a New Shepard rocket, landing safely in the West Texas desert after a trip of more than eight minutes.
Bezos was the second billionaire businessman in just nine days to travel to space, with Richard Branson of Virgin Galactic beat Bezos. The launch of Branson inspired lots of memes and jokes, and Bezos’ trip did the same.
Be warned: private part jokes await those who read on …
Ship shape
Bezos and his team rolled into what CNET’s Jackson Ryan calls a “gum ball shaped capsule“, lifted by a rocket called New Shepard.” Gumdrop “is a sweet descriptor, but when the capsule was at the top of the rocket, many people saw a less familial form.
“There are sometimes signs that people who work for a wealthy / powerful person have complete disregard for their boss,” wrote one Twitter user. “The dong rocket is one of those signs.”
Sometimes there are signs that people who work for a wealthy / powerful person have complete disregard for their boss. The dong rocket is one such sign.
– laundry (@thelaundrykcstl) July 20, 2021
Another user referred to a mohel, or the person who deals with ritual Jewish circumcisions.
And the references to weenie don’t end there …
Congratulations on your penis rocket now pay your taxes ✨✨
– Molly Jong-Fast (@MollyJongFast) July 20, 2021
I’m very busy today writing a country song about how my wife left me, so I’m running away from my taxes in a cock shaped rocket.
– Kellywise the clown🤡 (@KellywiseClown) July 20, 2021
Space penis is in the air
– Drew Magary (@drewmagary) July 20, 2021
Jeff Bezos makes a rocket dong as the ultimate form of compensation.
Guys with trucks lifted everywhere: NOT SO LITTLE NOW, IS IT ?!
– Dude_Abides (@ traininsane17) July 20, 2021
Expressway
Some jokes centered around Bezos and his group spending very little time in the air, landing in under 10 minutes.
“Wake me up when Bezos spends as much time in space as a dog,” wrote writer Alex Shephard, referring to Soviet space dog Laika.
The duration of this Blue Origin flight was … about one Quibi.
-David Gura (@davidgura) July 20, 2021
Sci-Fi movie plot
Others envisioned Bezos’ flight as the opening scene in a sci-fi movie, like Planet of the Apes.
“Oh no, what if Jeff Bezos traveled back in time and landed on a future land ravaged by the ignorance of mankind,” scoffed writer Dave Itzkoff.
oh no what if Jeff Bezos travels back in time and lands in a future land ravaged by the ignorance of mankind
-Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) July 20, 2021
11 minutes is more than enough time for everyone at the landing site to change into monkey costumes.
I’m not saying they should, but … they should.
– Max Kennerly (@MaxKennely) July 20, 2021
The end of Planet of the Apes but it’s just Bezos landing near wildfires out of control
– Matt S (@ MattSeg09) July 20, 2021
For better or for space
And some brought Bezos’ ex-wife Mackenzie Scott into the picture.
“It’s hard to imagine a better divorce outcome than getting $ 50 billion and your ex literally leaving the planet,” one Twitter user wrote.
hard to imagine a better divorce outcome than getting $ 50 billion and then your ex literally leaves the planet
– skoals muscles (@MuscleSkoals) July 19, 2021
On this monumental day when Jeff Bezos goes to space, I would like to warmly congratulate his ex-wife, MacKenzie Scott, who makes every woman’s dream come true who ever wished their ex would fall off the face of the planet; you are living the dream, my daughter.
– Jess the Prequel 🐾Cougar on the Prowl 😏🐾 (@JessthePrequel) July 20, 2021
Bezos goes to space, it’s like this episode of Bob’s Burgers where Teddy tries to show his boat to his ex-wife
– Arq (@CryptArq) July 20, 2021
Well, Jeff Bezos’ robbery ended pretty quickly.
Ex-wife: Things I could tell you.
– _JustMarie (@mooseandriosmom) July 20, 2021
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