Lily Allen opens up about feeling ‘worthless’ amid addiction battle and Miley Cyrus tour



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She remembered feeling “worthless” and turning to Adderall. “I had 14 stones [196 lbs.] and I didn’t feel like a pop star at all, “she says.” So, I started taking this drug called Adderall, which is like speed, to lose weight. And then I got addicted to this drug because it made me invincible and I could work really long hours and be all the different people I had to be back then. “

In 2014, Allen joined Miley Cyrus on her Bangerz tour, which was difficult for her sanity. “It was a very sexualized tour and I had just spent the last three years pushing babies,” she explained. “It couldn’t be less how I felt. And also, I had never supported anyone. So, I was kind of like coming back into this phase of being a pop star but I don’t. more on my terms. I was supporting this girl who was much younger and more attractive than I thought and I just started [many] manners.”

She then started cheating on her then-husband Sam Cooper, with whom she shares her daughter Ethel, 9, and daughter Marnie, 8. “I remember being in Los Angeles and thinking, ‘None of that works anymore. Maybe I should try heroin, “” she recalls. “I was in a scene… and I knew when that thought occurred to me, it was time to face my demons. That was about five years ago. And I started to recover.

Although she “got clean” after participating in a program, six months later she started drinking again. “I lost my marriage. I lost my house that I worked for 10 years to buy. My career began to fail. I lost all my friends. I was so irritated. So angry everything time. Really feel like the world owed me things, “she said. “It went on for another four years.”

Fortunately, Allen is sober again and is focused on developing a healthy relationship with his children. “I’m breaking this cycle. I felt so guilty that I neglected my kids in those early years of their lives and had to go on tour and behave badly like I was. really a great relationship with my kids now, “she explained.” I’m here to pick them up from the school gates whenever I can. I drop them off in the morning, and make them dinner, and they will come to me when they have problems, and that is golden to me. ”

Her current husband David Harbor, whom she married last year, also adds to her new, happier lifestyle. “I’m in a really happy and healthy relationship. He’s been sober, has been for 20 years now,” she explained. “We’re thinking about what we’re going to do with the rest of our lives … I don’t have as much as I had then in terms of success and wealth, but I have success and health in mind, which is more valuable I think. “

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