Riz Ahmed met his wife, Fatima Farheen Mirza, in a cafe

Well, everyone. It’s finish. Riz Ahmed is married. In fact, he got married months ago. I knew I had felt a change in the air; it feels good to finally know what it was. Rather than focusing on his wife, novelist Fatima Farheen Mirza – who is adorable, I’m sure – let’s review the circumstances of their chance meeting.

Ahmed and Mirza’s real meeting took place in a cafe. After revealing he was secretly married in a podcast interview on Monday, Ahmed continued Tonight’s show Wednesday and told Jimmy Fallon that he and his sweetheart both sat at the same table in a cafe while in New York City filming The sound of metal. I hope you are joking?

“We were both jostling each other on the same laptop connection points, like a very modern way to meet,” he says. Well, it’s just adorable. I’m really happy for both of them. I’m also happy for all the New York cafe writers – no, the world. This confirms that we have a chance.

“We met randomly,” Ahmed says of his wife, but as someone who has long believed in the fantasy of meeting a sexy guy in a cafe, that doesn’t seem random to me at all. It sounds like a dream. How many hundreds (thousands?) Of dollars have I spent on lattes and bagels while waiting for this exact scenario to unfold? I shudder at the idea. Of course, I never imagined that the hot guy I would see above the rim of my cup would be Riz Ahmed, because Ahmed Rice. My imagination takes liberties, but not so much.

My fellow cafe writers, we still have a chance. The second New York City reopens the indoor dining area and we can safely jostle the laptop outlets again, wish you all a pleasant stroll.