How to deal with family members who benefit from your personal life



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<p class = "canvas-atom canvas-text Mb (1.0em) Mb (0) – sm Mt (0.8em) – sm" type = "text" content = "Almost every holiday season, Los Angeles comedian Mary Mack and her husband Tim leave the city to visit their families. Inevitably, they wonder why they have not had children yet. "data-reactid =" 31 "> Almost every holiday season in Los Angeles comedian Mary Mack and her husband Tim leave the city to visit their families. Inevitably, they wonder why they have not had children yet.

<p class = "canvas-atom-canvas-text Mb (1.0em) Mb (0) – sm Mt (0.8em) – sm" type = "text" content = "" The other The question we get from the family is, "Do not you regret not having children?", Which is a lot more depressing than the first question, "Mack told HuffPost. "data-reactid =" 32 ">" The other The question we get from the family is, "Do not you regret not having children?", Which is a lot more depressing than the first question, "Mack told HuffPost.

<p class = "canvas-atom canvas-text Mb (1.0em) Mb (0) – sm Mt (0.8em) – sm" type = "text" content = "This year, she and her husband do things differently: instead of answering questions about when they will be going out a little, they let their Christmas cards speak: no, they still have no children, but they make to have a new baby in fur. "data-reactid =" 33 "> This year, she and her husband are doing things differently: instead of answering questions about when they are going to take a little one out, they let their Christmas cards speak: No, they're not. Still have not had children, but they make to have a new baby in fur.

The card that Mary Mack and her husband Tim are planning to send this year. (Mary Mack)

"The note that we have attached to our map says pretty much this:" This year for the holidays, we're not going anywhere, not even at home. We are tired. I hope you all rest too and that you start recycling. Dingo Dog (our baby) is really in it, "she said.

Mack is hardly the only one to dread the annual interrogation on his personal life during the holidays. Blame it on the fluid cabernet sauvignon, blame it on the boredom after dinner, but something about the holiday encourages family members, well-intentioned, to leverage and throw their manners out the door .

You can follow Mack's example and avoid the trip back home, but sometimes that is out of the question. Tara Griffith, a therapist and founder of Wellspace SF in San Francisco, said Tara Griffith, "If you have to face family members this year, so be prepared with repeated answers to the hot topics of your life.

"If you expect someone to ask you questions about your breakup, say something like," Yes, the breakup was difficult, but I think it was for the best and that I am in a better place because of that, "she said. . So say, "Speaking of the best place, tell me about your new home! "

<p class = "canvas-atom canvas-text Mb (1.0em) Mb (0) – sm Mt (0.8em) – sm" type = "text" content = "A genius tracking question like this allows you move the conversation and have your family member talk instead. "data-reactid =" 58 "> A question of genius like this allows you to shift the conversation and have your family member talk instead.

Griffin also recommends that you identify your "topics of discussion" …

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