Super Mario 3D World multiplayer may not mix with a relationship

Mario platform games are pretty cool when I play alone. A tricky level can appear sometimes, but 95% of Mario games can be completed by anyone with a passing familiarity with platforms. Time is rarely a factor, after all, and don’t worry if you die, because you have a million lives in store.

Super Mario 3D World definitely falls into this category. I enjoyed the first worlds on the Nintendo Switch, but I don’t remember feeling challenged. It was all within my abilities.

Then I added a second person and it was all fucked up.

Two is a crowd?

When played solo, Super Mario 3D World keeps throwing legends – on the world map and at the start of each level – for other players to participate. It sounds like what you might see in an arcade beat-’em-up, trying to pull in another source of quarters with a Marge or Rafael joining the fight. But if you manage to face another player, the cooling dynamics during single player play will change drastically.

While Mario Kart attracts a lot of attention for ruining friendships, you wouldn’t necessarily expect something similar from a Mario platformer. After all, everyone is just trying to get to the end of the level together, right? 3d world even encourages cooperation through the design of levels. Panels that change position each time you jump require communication between players to ensure no one is sent to an untimely demise. In another level, players can work together to issue commands while riding a dinosaur named Plessie. Plessie goes faster the more the two players are in sync.

It all seemed like an idyllic teamwork heaven and made me think maybe I should play with my wife. She is definitely not into platform games, preferring slower brain efforts like Stardew Valley and Don’t starve. But, I don’t know, did that sound like a fun way to hang out together?

Image: Nintendo EAD Tokyo / Nintendo

It turns out that playing with other people turns 3d world in blood sport. For every time you have to work together, there are three times you sprint after a second Fire Flower, even if you already have one, just for a few extra points.

You see, every thing you do in 3d world You earn points, and these points are counted on the scoreboard at the end of each level. The person with the highest score on the scoreboard? They get a crown. AT carry. Maybe you see where this is going.

Things were going well because my wife and I played the first few levels. There was a tense moment when I accidentally picked up a second Mega Mushroom, causing her to miss the experience of becoming a huge toad of destruction, but she knew I hadn’t done it on purpose.

Then the scoreboard appeared at the end of the level. I had narrowly beaten her, thanks to the Mega Mushrooms and my higher placement on the final level mast. The crown was mine.

I could tell she accepted it, but wasn’t thrilled. It was like a light touch to finish a level, only to remind her that she could have done better.

After one or two more levels where I was still narrowly beating his score, I skipped things to the level I was currently in my solo room: a boss level with Bowser and a giant train. I’m not quite sure what I did there, but I guess she’s passed away a few times and I absolutely gutted her sheet music at the end. It wasn’t even close. It was such an explosion that I started to laugh uncontrollably. It wasn’t for jubilation, it was just uncomfortable surprise, like a loud fart at a funeral.

And then I made a fatal mistake: I took a screenshot of the dashboard.

Image: Nintendo EAD Tokyo / Nintendo via Polygon

Deep in my head I was thinking: Uh, maybe that would be a fun thing to write, how that nice looking friendly game turned into a competitive massacre. And having a little art to go along with that story would help. But she naturally read the screenshot as a flex. She threw the controller on the couch next to me to signal that she was done a lot.

When everyone is the first player

She was absolutely right to pull the cord, and I quickly apologized. What happened was not at all what I expected. I envisioned a utopia where we would help each other through difficult jumps or find hidden objects like we were on a treasure hunt. That’s the spirit of Mario platform games, right? It’s about the thrill of exploring, trying new things in a friendly space.

While Mario Kart and Mario Party seem to like giving you ways to fuck other players, Mario’s base games are generally supportive. Think of Cappy in Super Mario Odyssey, which can be controlled by a second player helpful to help Mario with jumps and attacks. Hell, even the infamous Baby Bowser becomes a useful friend when a second player walks in. Bowser’s fury. There is no fighting for the coins or the fiery flowers in these games, it is just about working towards a common goal.

But these secondary characters lack agency. They have no control over the camera or where Mario goes. They are only there to aid Mario in his quest, rather than taking command themselves.

In 3d world, additional players have the same abilities as the first player, the same right to grab any items they want, and the same ability to move the action forward at any time. Suddenly, everyone has the same power.

The stark contrast between single player and multiplayer in Super Mario 3D World isn’t really a bad thing… under the right circumstances. In my college days, this would have been a huge hit in the dorms, with playful heckling and a few beers. A controller might have been thrown in someone’s direction, but, you know, the students and everybody.

Perhaps less ideal: someone who lives with you and loves you a lot, but isn’t super jazzed up by platform games or competitive games and would much prefer you to leave her with Update 1.5. of Stardew Valley. In short? Read the play.