Let women be, trips to villages are hell on earth :: Kenya

Barack Obama came and gone, this time without holidays, brass band and state dinners. Like the last time, Michelle and her daughters were visibly absent, preferring to visit Serengeti and party with Beyoncé.

The absence of Michelle made Kenyans talk, some having invented fun memes saying that Barack Obama is facing the same challenge as African men … spouses refusing to accompany you to your home country. ancestral home.

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This fight for ancestral home visits is a common denominator in most African households since men like to bring their wives back to the village to demonstrate that they have settled down and are successful family men.

The pressure is generally at its highest level during the end of the year holidays. Some women recognize the value of such visits in maintaining the family unit and harmony and thus support the pilgrimage to the village. Such women, however, are in the minority because the majority of spouses remain in the country, choosing to stay in the city and leave their men to fend for themselves in the village.

Men claim not to understand why women hate these trips to villages, so today we offer them some ideas on why. Let's start with the fact that most of the so-called village houses are huts at worst and iron at best.

Living in such homes for a day is a punishment for women who have become accustomed to the traps and comfort of life in the city. This sometimes means having to spend endless hours fighting strange insects or dealing with supernatural sounds that are magnified due to the lack of power. It also means having to give up simple comfort such as microwave food or a cold drink.

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Most women shower after leaving high school – but often, trips to the village become reminders of the harshness of life and how village life can be damaging to those beautiful nails, weavings and acrylic braids.

Quite simply, most village residences or shags feel like torture after the comfort of the city. This challenges the logic: after working so hard throughout the year, women can voluntarily choose to go live in sordid conditions.

What men do not know is that visiting a woman in her husband's village often looks like a long time of examination. The woman has to face the endless evaluation and criticism of her husband's parents and villagers about everything.

In the village, everything she does is harshly judged – be it the length of her dress or the way her back moves when she walks. Woe to her if her children and her husband are too thin, badly behaved, or do not know the local dialect or the family tree: she will have to take responsibility for the sad state of affairs.

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People in the village are not known to remain silent about their feelings, so the woman has to endure with live returns, which could be anything from vicious looks to venomous verbal assaults – dealing with the moral police of the village not easy.

Most women know that their stay in the village depends on the number and nature of the women on her husband's property. Her stay will be happy if her mother-in-law and her sisters-in-law love her: her stay can also be hell if she does not follow the line. To win the favor of the female past and especially the matriarch of the house, the woman must change according to the time of day and the day of the week.

Come in the morning, she must plow the fields diligently and come in the evening, she must work on the stove. When Sunday rolls she must be seen serving in the pulpit. All this constant need to please can drive any crazy woman out of her mind, and it 's no wonder that most women prefer to stay out and stay away from home. spare the misery.

What makes trips to the village so horrible is that some find it tremendous pleasure to trace their roots. They become complete villagers preferring to visit their old haunts, do the same old things that they used to do, like sleeping local beauties, catching up with local gossip and slaughtering large quantities of local beer. Most of them choose to ignore or minimize the afflictions suffered by their partners. Any attempt to complain is considered a diva queen with obsessive demands.

Many men fail to understand how much smoke from firewood is uncomfortable, or how long long crouches can be difficult, or even what are the damages caused by traveling water on the skin and nails.

As this lack of empathy is missing and rarely happens, it is not surprising that women completely avoid the village trip. Perhaps the best solution is to let women be, those who want to go to the village should be allowed, those who do not want it should be left out.

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