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Michael B. Jordan and Lori Harvey are Instagram officials. After months of dating rumors, the couple posted corresponding portraits on Sunday evening.
“Faves!” Gabrielle Union wrote in response to the couple’s adorable photos. “Love it! Congratulations!” D-Nice added. “BEAUTIFUL”, commented Malika Haqq.
But the other reactions weren’t so kind. In fact, many – especially those on Twitter – have focused on Harvey’s dating history, ridiculing the 24-year-old for ‘walking through’ famous men.
It’s true that Harvey, a model (and, yes, the daughter-in-law of TV personality Steve Harvey), has had previous relationships. She has been linked to rapper Future, Trey Songz, Justin Combs (and later to her father, Sean “Diddy” Combs); she was also engaged to Dutch footballer Memphis Depay in 2017. It’s not the number of men she’s been paired with that makes her unique. The number, in fact, makes her incredibly normal. What sets Harvey apart is the celebrity aspect of it all.
If we normalized “dating” it wouldn’t be a discussion of how many men Lori Harvey has dated.
– Layceeđź’• (@layyccee) January 11, 2021
So they do what they always do. They smear shame and smear liberated women in the hope that we will fall back in line and simply agree to be “wives” by a man with nothing but the bare minimum and no personality, goals or ambition to offer. Make no mistake, they are afraid.
– Ambrosia ™ Freelance Hottie® (@ambrosia_omG) January 11, 2021
Lori Harvey is not a lmao pioneer you haven’t gone out before? She did not discover any encounters with lmao
– Queen D. (@radricadavis_) January 11, 2021
Lori Harvey hasn’t even dated a lot of people. It’s just that all the men she’s dated have been very well known. People need to relax
– Apartment Ann Marie Lastrassi (@naledimashishi) January 11, 2021
While the judgment, in general, is unwarranted, the negative attention focused directly on Harvey raises another point: why was his male counterpart immune from punishment? Jordan, 33, has also been linked to other women, including musician Snoh ​​Aalegra, Lupita Nyong’o and KiKi Layne.
La’Toya Hart, founder of the Heartbreak Clinic, a resource that aims to help women heal from grief through classes and other tools, attributes the one-sided reaction to society’s double standard.
“Historically, men have been celebrated when they have a long dating history,” Hart tells Yahoo Life. “This is evident in the divided opinions on the history of Michael and Lori’s dating. While the two have a history, many have only acknowledged Lori’s past. Having a long history of dating has subjected many women to ridicule and judgment; the traditional view is that women’s history should be limited or not have it. The reality is dating allows men and women to explore; It takes time, experience, and maturity to learn what you want in a partner. “
Hart notes that one of the most important things a woman can do is decide what she wants in a partner and what she’s willing to give up, which she commends Harvey for doing.
“Lori Harvey’s dating history over the years shows that she is a woman who knows her worth and the value she brings to a relationship, and she is committed to being with someone who meets those expectations, ”says Hart. “The perception may be that she’s an opportunist or someone who’s ‘on the move’ due to society’s double standard, now it’s time for all women to question that narrative. Women need to feel empowered to challenge the status quo and pursue the things they want.
Although dating has changed over the years, Hart says many people’s views have yet to catch up.
“The natural solution to this problem is to challenge traditional views and ensure that societal dating is adjusted to ensure that they are more inclusive,” she notes. “When a woman finds the courage to let go, the most important thing we can do is offer love, support and encouragement without judgment.”
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