The Flight Attendant: Cassie’s Most Terrible Decisions



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Cassie what are you doing!
Photo: Jirathit Saengavut / HBO Max

After 12 years and millions and millions of dollars, Kaley Cuoco landed from The Big Bang Theory to launch his own television projects. She’s already booked a voice role as the very funny Harley Quinn, but her first new big live-action project is HBO’s comedy thriller Max. The stewardess, which launches its first three episodes today. It’s a smart showcase for Cuoco’s winning comedic talent, albeit at times infuriating, as his titular flight attendant character Cassie wakes up next to a corpse in a hotel room in Bangkok and then takes the worst decisions imaginable. Cassie, a good time girl we met via a montage on Sofi Tukker’s “Good Time Girl,” has a drinking problem and a propensity to engage in wacky schemes to try to prove her innocence in the midst of it. which soon becomes apparent is a vast criminal conspiracy. As Cassie does her best, but inevitably continues to mess up, we’re here to follow up on some of her worst decisions along the way. Needless to say, spoilers await us.

Don’t walk in with the hot guy in the airplane bathroom if the only thing you know about him is he reads Crime and Punishment!
I absolutely respect and love a cute little mile-high hookup, but Cassie really should take extra care with a Dostoyevsky dude. She claims to have read enough Russian literature to make a joke about how all women fare badly in Crime and Punishment (read: the protagonist decides to murder a woman just to see what it looks like), and whom she prefers Dr Zhivago, and yet she is always ready to do it?
Bad decision level: Okay, so this guy is gonna entangle you in a murder, but he looks like Michiel Huisman, so I get it.

Don’t sneak up with the hot dude who was reading Crime and Punishment without telling anyone!
It ends up working well for Cassie, in that once the hot dude is murdered there’s less of a trail leading directly to her. But if you go on an adventure with a mysterious Dostoyevsky magnet stranger, you should really tell a friend about it so they can help you.
Bad decision level: Cassie, have you ever heard of the buddy system?

Don’t leave the hot guy’s corpse in your hotel room!
This is where Cassie’s bad decision making really begins. Once she wakes up next to Michiel Huisman covered in blood, she immediately calls her friend, lawyer Zosia Mamet, and panics that she will be Amanda Knox-ed and jailed if she reports the murder to Bangkok police. May be! But there is enough blood all over her body that she certainly cannot hide his presence. So she decides to run.
Bad decision level: Extremely bad. Extremely incriminating!

Above all, don’t clean up a crime scene in your hotel room!
Alright, alright, I get the impulse of flight or flight to escape the scene … may be. But in a fit of panic, Cassie as well decides to try to clean up the crime scene, try to pick up all the pieces of a broken wine bottle that could have been the murder weapon (thus get her DNA everywhere), and take a shower (she missing blood under her fingernails anyway).
Bad decision level: Have you seen episodes of CSI, or even Dexter, Cassie? No one is good enough to clean up all the evidence, especially you!

Don’t act suspiciously after poorly cleaning up a crime scene in your hotel room!
As soon as Cassie flees the crime scene, she starts to act erratically, wrapping a scarf around her (which confuses her friend Rosie Perez), insisting that it’s weird that their flight is delayed (this is not, according to Rosie Perez), and accidentally serving vodka to an Air Marshal who only asked for soda (a crime, says Rosie Perez).
Bad decision level: Nerves are understandable, but Cassie, you really need to focus on your job!

Don’t try to run away from your interview with the FBI!
Once Cassie lands in the US, she’s called in for an interview with the FBI because they, of course, found the guy’s body sexy and, of course, interviewing the flight attendants on the plane of the sexy guy. Cassie tries to evade this interview by exiting the airport by pretending not to hear the announcer repeatedly say her name.
Bad decision level: No, that won’t make you the absolute center of suspicion, Cassie! Not at all!

Don’t lie about details that are easy to verify in your interview with the FBI!
Once she’s been dragged into an FBI interview, Cassie decides the best thing to do is pretend nothing has happened between her and the hot guy from 3C headquarters, despite all of her chatty colleagues. saw it unfold.
Bad decision level: Cassie, why! This further erodes your credibility!

Don’t try to go to the dead dude’s office under a false name to carry out inane espionage!
Cassie, I don’t care if the hot death hallucination that haunts you now told you that this would be a good way to find the woman you vaguely remember from the bender you went to before she died, you will be caught and continued. outside the office!
Bad decision level: Cassie, that makes you more and more suspicious. Also, don’t knock over an expensive bunny statue.

Don’t blame your best friend and colleague Rosie Perez, and don’t lie about being photographed in Bangkok!
She saw you in the scarf! It’s obvious.
Bad decision level: Never alienate Rosie Perez! She just wants what’s best for you.

Don’t suddenly overthrow everything in the FBI at the insistence of your lawyer friend because the ghost / memory of the dead haunting you tells you to!
And lie at the end and say he was alive when you left!
Bad decision level: As lawyer Zosia Mamet tells Cassie in the episode, “I’m watching you make some really bad decisions.” Yes of course!

Don’t corner the woman you saw in the office when your bar investigation failed!
It works pretty well for Cassie as long as she learns of Miranda’s existence, but there are so many ways it could have gone wrong.
Bad decision level: Cassie, will you ever listen to the good advice of lawyer friend Zosia Mamet?

Don’t go to the dead man’s funeral just to try to convince his mother to confirm a theory of the jackpot you have!
And above all, don’t take your sneaky gay colleague to the funeral of the dead without telling him what the event is! It just creates a terrible working environment for him.
Bad decision level: Your snarky gay colleague deserves better than this!

It’s not about Cassie, but if you’re Rosie Perez, don’t get involved in a corporate espionage scheme that involves hacking into your husband’s computer!
Rosie Perez, I love it when you say the word “jadeite” because your cover in this plot is you want to buy a piece of jadeite, but the whole corporate espionage scene is really not going to be okay.
Bad decision level: Cassie level, that is to say not very good!

Don’t approach the mother of the deceased who also owns most of the shady society that’s sort of at the center of this plot at her son’s funeral!
First of all, give the woman some space, her son is dead. Second, she obviously has a bunch of morons at her command and she’ll hiss them at you.
Bad decision level: Cassie, you are reaching new lows.

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