18 Thoughts on Red Sox Fans Holding a Hostage Banner

On Wednesday, the Boston Globe published a report about a group of Red Sox fans from outside Boston who came into possession of an "AL East Champions" after it fell out of a truck. The banner was heading to Fenway Park after the Sox landed East Asia – which they beat against the Yankees – but apparently fell off a truck.

Now, fans are holding the banner hostage until the Red Sox give them tickets, money or both. Here are some thoughts I have on this story.

Update: The fans have returned the banner for … nothing. No tickets, no money. Nothing.

There are also allegations that the banner was stolen rather than simply found on the road with the owner of Flagraphics (the company that manufactured the banner), saying, "We already have a new banner" and he did not know. he did not fall off the truck or get out of the truck. . . . I have been working for the Boston Red Sox since 1992. Nothing has ever happened like that. "

Fans fervently deny it and also say that they have never been short of money and that they have always wanted to make it. After reporting on the record that they wanted money from the team. Which makes it even more funny. In any case, my thoughts below are standing up. But the banner is safe and sound in Fenway.

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1. The people who have the banner come from Malden, MA, which makes this story amazing right from the jump. There has never been a time in Malden where "it's fallen off a truck" was really true then the props of these two incredible city dwellers to make this phrase legitimate for once.

2. This is without a doubt the best thing that falls from a truck in Somerville. Do not even have to check that one.

3. How does a banner "fall from a truck" so easily? You thought of a delivery to Red Sox, you'd better make sure she was well attached. There are a lot of banners, there have been a lot of deliveries, maybe checking if a huge banner is not about to slip back before getting out of a 7 Eleven parking lot.

4. The way they actually got the banner is amazing. Cross traffic lanes, in their words "through [expletive]Like three cars, "then taking him to the trunk on the side of a highway without being killed is a success in itself.

5. They did not just do an interview with the World, they made a ransom video. I do not transcribe everything because it is absolutely necessary to look for oneself, to really immerse yourself in the accents and atmosphere of what is happening here.

But any video that starts with "Now we have our cawfee, we are going to drive on McGrath HIghway to Somahville, and we noticed a coupla cahs swaying to the right and we saw something in the street …" promises to be. guaranteed gold in Boston and it does not disappoint.

6. These guys had no idea what they were even risking their lives, which is extremely Malden's behavior. Hey, is it a huge thing in the middle of a busy highway? Yeah. Do we know what it is? Definitely not. Even just recycling or random manufacturing materials that we would not know what to do. Should we still get it? Absolutely yes. Go running through the traffic so that we can have it in the car.

7. It is difficult to ask for something in return, but it is reasonable to think that teams are exchanging things like the first home MLB circuit and all the rest. It's a huge banner they need, so it's not really the demand that's amazing. That's what they ask.

These guys are shooting for the stars. Tickets for the playoffs. Cash right. And they want things that have the same value as the banner, waiting to see what it's worth to the team before accepting an exchange. What legends

8. The Red Sox should absolutely print another one. The team is in New York from time to time in Cleveland, so she does not intend to suspend her as early as Monday when the team is at home against Baltimore. It is the fault of the supplier who lost it in the first place, so the cost of an urgent job is probably canceled. The team has no reason to engage with these guys, really.

9. The Red Sox should not print another one. I want to see where these ransom discussions are going. They have already been in contact with the bannernappers so there is already a dialogue.

10. One of the guys' names is "Louie Iacuzzi". If Malden's Louie Iacuzzi was the character of a Dennis Lehane novel, he would feel too clichéd and his editor might ask him to soften it a bit.

11. They claim that they have "connections" that they could also resell, which is certainly not true, but absolutely something that two guys from Malden would say when they are drunk at the pub there is a camera that points them, or both. "Yah I know a fence, do not ask me how do I know a fence, I would do it well?" This is my guy, we did business before the end of things?

12. There are no more "Boston guys" than a photo. Put it in the Smithsonian as a representation of Boston's values.

13. If the Red Sox reprint the banner and simply use it, they threaten to show up at Fenway (excuse me, FENWAY PAHK) with this one and expose the team for using a replacement banner. This is now all I want to do in the whole world.

I want four film crews and a police presence to follow them and the banner on Lansdowne Street and this is a test that involves one of them shouting, "We are suspicious of the Bahah ! This is the real bannah! Cawm get the original and give us tickets you cowahds! "

14. They take care of the banner in this video. Fold it gently while rolling it back to its original state. It's comforting, really. Some "We will not hurt the banner as we want what we want" and I respect hell.

15. The combination of the two men dressed in a flannel and a T-shirt with a mousetrap could not be more perfect for this occasion. You're about to be in a video for the Boston Globewhat would you wear in the world? I bet at least one of them has changed Celtic jerseys, they were wearing something just before the camera was launched.

16. Boston is at the center of it all, so it's certainly not wrong, but at the same time, if you told me it was a stealthy pilot for a Boston version of It's always sunny in Philadelphia I would believe you absolutely, no questions asked.

17. The two guys make sure they really like and love the Red Sox in the video, as if to reassure people that they do not do it because they hate the Sox, which is amazing because no one will doubt of that. they were anything but Malden fans trying to take advantage of the team. At no moment

18. Never, never, these guys will stop talking to anyone about it. EVERRRRRRRR. You can count on that.