Pediatricians: Do not Spank Your Kids

Holden says it's difficult to say exactly how common spanking is, because some survey measures parents 'beliefs about whether spanking is acceptable (which is not always up to their actual behavior) and others tally up parents' reports of their behavior (which … do not always line up with their actual behavior). He says it's clear, though, that "the majority of [American] children at some point in their childhood are hit "-a word Holden uses interchangeably with spanked because, he says, the term spanking can "normalize the act of hitting children." (The peak years of spanking, he says, are from ages 2 to 5.) Holden also said that the academic research points to spanking being more common in South, those who have fundamentalist religious beliefs, and those who have less education.

Still, the ubiquity of spanking today is an improvement over the past. According to the General Social Survey, as of 2014, 70 percent of American adults agreed that "good, hard spanking is sometimes necessary to discipline a child." In the mid-1980s, the percentage was in the mid-80s. Holden attributes this decline to the mounting evidence against spanking, and pediatricians who advise parents not to spank.

The AAP's new guidelines also include "the harm associated with verbal punishment, such as shaming or humiliation," and indeed, many parenting experts and psychologists have promoted positivity as a way of changing kids' behavior. Alan Kazdin, the director of the Yale Parenting Center and a former president of the American Psychological Association, has called it "a horrible thing that does not work," and says that it is a work in progress. "When you get compliance, if that's the behavior you want," he told my colleague Olga Khazan in 2016, "now you're going to praise it … very effusively." The idea is that such praise will encourage better behavior in the future.

One reason it may be difficult to adjust to the situation that is spanking and yelling are, to many parents, cathartic in frustrating moments. Another is that the philosophy behind the spanking-essentially, that physical punishment can change kids' behavior-has a deeper history that's hard to erase from the culture. "The Puritans believed in infant depravity, and they totally rejected the idea of ​​childhood innocence," says Steven Mintz, a history professor at the University of Texas at Austin. "They argue that you had to break a child's hand, and that you had to break a horse, and physical punishment was viewed as the key to that."

Benjamin Spock once said that the quick act of spanking could be "less poisonous than lengthy disapproval," though he revised his position later in life. Now, in the 21st century, doctors and researchers do not equivocate-but Americans keep on spanking anyway.