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Mary Jo Chatelain personally understands how Alzheimer's disease can affect the families of clients that she serves through her home-based business.
She and her husband Steve moved to North Platte a few years ago to run their home care business. Nine years ago, Mary Jo and her siblings began to see the signs of Alzheimer's disease at their father's house. For reasons of confidentiality, Mary Jo asked that her father's name not be given.
"He lives in Lincoln," said Mary Jo. "He is a retired teacher and coach and lives with his wife, but he is already at a point where he may not be able to live alone anymore."
He was diagnosed in the summer of 2017.
"My sisters, who have spent a lot more time around him, say that they see things every time before our mother dies," said Mary Jo.
Her father remarried and Mary Jo said that they love and appreciate his wife because of the care that she brings him.
"She is a wonderful Christian woman and she does a great job," said Mary Jo. "They talk about his illness and they talk about it as if it was only an unwanted visitor, but we sort of had to deal with it."
Mary Jo said for her that working at home is a blessing.
"It was just another reason God put us where we were because I systematically learned the disease," said Mary Jo. "We teach solid training on Alzheimer's disease. So I've learned it thoroughly and I'm shocked to see how much of it happens when we have it.
Upon learning from the experience, Mary Jo said that there are things that she does sometimes.
"The first thing families do is correct them and tell them," Oh, dad, you also remember, "says Mary Jo." I understand why they're doing this because I did it with my father one evening. "
She said that she can describe this moment in detail.
"It was at a high school football match, Lincoln High," said Mary Jo. "Dad said something that was very wrong and confusing and I said," Dad, you remember, he left Miami last summer. "
She said the look on her face said, "Yes, I should have known."
"I heard myself say that and I thought I was spending business hours telling people," Do not say that, and it just popped out of my mouth, "said Mary Jo. "But I understood in this heartbeat why families are doing this."
Mary Jo also learned something of herself at that time.
"I really was not trying to fix it, I was facing my own denial and sadness with my smart, funny, amazing dad who had this loss and that was real," said Mary Jo with a lot of emotion and a few tears. "I had heard reports from members of my family, but that was the first time this had happened with me."
She said that when she went to Lincoln to spend time with her father, she had to find things to do that did not force her to actively engage in a conversation about the past.
"One of the things we do is that he loves eggs McMuffins, so we go through McDonald's and then we go to Lincoln's Sunken Gardens," said Mary Jo. "We can just go through the gardens and he'll say," Well, it's beautiful. Then he will say, "How many times have I said beautiful? Am I saying that too much? "
Mary Jo said that her father was a singer in their church when she was little.
"He has a beautiful voice," said Mary Jo. "I started carrying a hymnbook in my car, so when we drive around Lincoln, we sing old hymns.
Alzheimer's takes your most recent memories first.
"He could not tell you what he necessarily had for breakfast, but he can remember at least three verses from the old sturdy cross, because it's so deep in his memory," he said. Mary Jo.
She said that Alzheimer's disease is unlike any other disease.
"We're so used to going to the doctor and hearing," Well, we've diagnosed you and you have this disease, here's your pill, go and go well, "said Mary Jo. "Alzheimer's is such a thief – a thief taking hostages."
Mary Jo said that there is a lot of support available for families who are facing the disease.
"If I could send a message to families facing this problem, do not do it alone," she said.
The Alzheimer's Association website, at alz.org, contains resources and information on various Walk to End Alzheimer programs. The local walk will be held on September 23rd at Cody Park and registration, donations and volunteer information can be found by clicking the "Find Your Walk" button on this website.
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