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The University of Kansas Cancer Center has lost a colon and it would really, really. really love the return. Last week, despicable thieves stole the $ 4,000 gigantic inflatable colon from the Cancer Center in the back of a Kansas City pickup truck Wichita Eagle reports. Between this and this giant nose, a person took a porch in Portland last week, it seems that some crooks are on the right track to form a complete body.
The colon was heading for a fun local run, where the Cancer Coalition planned to use it to teach some joggers about colon cancer. Unfortunately, participants will now have to find other ways less fun and much more rude to learn about intestinal health.
"Screening for colorectal cancer is the most powerful weapon we have against colorectal cancer," said cancer oncologist John Ashcraft, in a statement. "Colon cancer is a difficult topic for many people and the giant inflatable colon of 150 pounds and ten feet long is an excellent topic of conversation."
It's hard to understand why, precisely, some crooks steal a huge colon because there are probably cheaper and less disgusting conversation starters that do not require the scam of a university cancer lab. Do they worry about their own risk of colon cancer and hope that a careful inspection of the internal functioning of the intestine will improve their chances? Are they organizing a kind of really fucking party? If they were hoping to use this as an improvised inflatable home, they would be very disappointed once they'd blew the thing up.
The Cancer Center has already started trying to raise funds to replace the colon, but to this day they are still far from their ultimate goal. Hopefully burglars will realize the importance of educating the masses about cancer and will discover in their hearts the return of the original. If they really want to hang out in a giant gut, they just have to drink wine in this big anus in Belgium and call it good.
If you live in Kansas City and notice a big pink balloon appearing in your neighbor's garden or something else, give the police a ring. The staff at the University of Kansas Cancer Center will have an eternal debt and it's probably good to be able to count on you to have it.
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This article originally appeared on VICE US.
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