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Crows, Browns and Bears fans will probably not have to celebrate Halloween next week and that's because I'm pretty sure they've had enough of the horrors this weekend .
Of all the things I did not expect to see in Week 7, I can tell you that Justin Tucker misses an extra point at the top of the list. If you'd asked me over the weekend what was most likely to happen, Blake Bortles scoring 700 yards in a match or missing an extra Tucker point, I certainly would not have said that Tucker missing an extra point because this guy never missed. Well, he never missed. Now, it's missing sometimes.
I mean, just look at his face. It's a combination of horror and shock that we usually only see on someone's face as he looks at the end of a M movie. Night Shyamalan or the overtime game of a Browns game. Brown's fans are basically doing this every week, mainly because Cleveland always seems to find an exciting new way to lose.
This week the Browns lost on a 59-yard placement and, given his reaction, I do not know if Baker Mayfield was shocked by the kick or by the fact that he's now playing for a team who is destined to lose for the rest of eternity.
Of course, the only thing that is worse than losing on a 59 yard pitch is to lose after FILLING a Hail Mary pass in the final game of the match, which is exactly what the Bears did.
In most cases, a Hail Mary is a fairly easy game to play: several guys run in the end zone and then the quarterback throws the ball at the catch. However, the Bears have left out a key element and this would be the part where someone is bumping into the end zone. The pitch of MIchell Trubisky has not reached the end zone either. Basically, if the end zone did not exist, the Bears performed the perfect Hail Mary.
That 's Kevin White who catches the ball and is stopped at the one – meter line in the last game of a match as the Bears lost 38-31. Ouch.
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Although these three defeats were difficult, no one had a worse weekend than the Vikings fan who had his car on fire. Apparently, there has been an accident problem at MetLife Stadium and if we can all learn one thing, it is that you should never queue at MetLife Stadium.
Let me say that if there is a situation that calls the shocked face of Justin Tucker, she comes out of an NFL stadium and notices that your car has been burned.
The good news is that the car was a rental and no one was injured. The bad news here is that six other cars have also caught fire.
This must be the record for most cars on fire during an NFL game. If it were hot tables, Buffalo would certainly hold the record, but I think the car's record belongs to the Jets.
Whatever it is, you know what else will be fired this week? My choices, so let's go.
In fact, before coming to my choices, here's a quick reminder that you can check out the weekly picks of all CBSSports.com NFL experts by clicking here. If you should click here and consult other experts this week, it's because Jared Dubin has led us all behind the bonfire. Dubin was 11-3 with his picks at week 7 and now I regret the fact that I spent all my money on Mega Million tickets, whereas I could have used that money to bet on Dubin's choices. If I had bet on Dubin 's choices, I would have won and would have even more money to spend on Mega Millions tickets. I clearly did not think about that.
On a related note, if I win the lottery, the first thing I will do is set my car on fire so I can see what it looks like to attend some of the Jets.
So which teams should you return to the eighth week of the NFL season? And which competitor of the Super Bowl is struggling? Now check out SportsLine to see which teams win more than 50% of the simulations, all from the model that outperformed 98% of the experts that NFLPickWatch.com has followed in the past two seasons.
Okay, let's move on to my choices.
Choice of the 8th week of the NFL
Philadelphia vs Jacksonville in London
9:30 am ET (NFL Network)
It's a good thing the Jaguars have decided to keep Blake Bortles at the starting quarterback position this week, because if there is one person you do not want to put on a bench for a match in London, it's Bortles. Bortles does not know how to play football on American soil, but when you throw him on English soil, he turns into Tom Brady.
Since the start of the 2015 season, Bortles had 18-34 in America, but 3-0 in London and the Jaguars averaged 36 points per game for those three wins. Basically, Bortles is unbeatable in London. In fact, I think you could easily argue that he's more successful in England than all the unnamed Americans Meghan Markle. Based on Bortles' figures, I now fully understand why Shad Khan wants to move the Jags to London. I mean, if your starter only played well in one country, you would also like to move your team there. That being said, if Bortles is in another crisis, I really expect the Jaguars to spend the nine-hour flight home, begging the Eagles to trade them for Nick Foles.
In the non-Bortles department, the Eagles have not been able to run the ball this season, which means that they will not be able to take advantage of Jacksonville's race defense, which has been the bigger defensive of the Jags. weakness this year. If this game were played in America, I would take the Eagles by two touchdowns, but it's impossible for me to play against Bortles and the crazy Harry Potter magic that takes place in England.
The choice: Jaguars 20-16 against Eagles
Indianapolis to Oakland
16:05 ET (CBS)
What's fun with this game is that I do not know who will be playing for the Raiders this week, because there is a 70% chance that they will try to trade half of their team before the event. Sending of these two teams on Sunday. After exchanging Amari Cooper, I am now convinced that Jon Gruden is willing to exchange anything that is not nailed to the Raiders' practice center. I can only imagine what it feels like to be Reggie McKenzie right now.
"Hi Reg, this office in my office, what do you think we could get for that in a trade?"
"Nothing, it's an office."
"I'm going to tell you what Reg, I think you're wrong, I bet we could have a first round, Jerry Jones likes the offices, call the Cowboys."
In addition to exchanging his best players, Gruden seems to be complaining about the rushlessness of his team, which is a good thing for me because it explains the irony to my 9 year old son . the nephew has now become much easier.
The problem of not being pressed by a pass is that it means that the opposite quarter can sit down and separate you, and when that quarterback is Andrew Luck, you're in trouble. Over the past four weeks, Luck has had a difficult time that no one has really noticed because he plays in a 2-5 team. Since the 4th week, Luck has thrown 15 touchdown passes, and to give you an idea of the ridiculous, no other quarter has yet launched 12 touchdown passes since the 4th week (Patrick Mahomes has launched nine during this period ).
The most incredible thing about Luck's run is that his offensive line actually protects him. The Colts' quarterback has not been sacked once in the past two weeks, which is a bit crazy when you know it's the second time in his career that he's been arguing two consecutive games without being sacked. Of course, after being hit in every room for the first five years of his career, Luck deserves somehow this break of a few weeks without success.
The choice: Colts 31-20 on the Raiders
Green Bay to Los Angeles Rams
4:25 ET (FOX)
Normally, I never choose against Aaron Rodgers, but I have a rule that replaces the rule "Do not choose Aaron Rodgers" and it's "Do not choose against an undefeated team at home, especially when this unbeaten team has Todd Gurley. "All you need to know about Gurley this season is that he has scored more points alone than the Bills have scored all year.
I do not know if that means that the bills are bad, Gurley is good or a combination of both.
An interesting thing about this game is that the Packers are a nine point outsider. Aaron Rodgers has never been a nine-point underdog in a regular season game and the more I think about this game, the more I love the Packers. On the other hand, Rodgers' injured knee had an extra week to heal thanks to the Green Bay Bye. Speaking of farewell, Rodgers is 7-2 in his career. He has also never intercepted a Wade Phillips defense (10 touchdowns, no interception) and is undefeated in his career against the Rams (4-0). I think I just convinced myself to take the Packers, unless it's the case
The downside is that the quarterback may be the only one on the field where the Packers are definitely better than the Rams. Also, did I mention that Todd Gurley scored more points than any other NFL team? I did it. OK, I just wanted to be sure.
Rodgers alone will turn this game into a shootout, but I feel the Rams just have more ammo.
The choice: Rams 41-34 on Packers
New Orleans Minnesota
20:20 ET (NBC)
The NFL calendar makers really wanted to really break this Minneapolis Miracle story on the faces of the Saints this year because I'm sure that's the only way to explain why the league would send the Saints to Minnesota EXACTLY NINE MONTHS after the Vikings. wild win in the playoffs.
The entire population of Minneapolis will double this week as Marcus Williams missed a tackle nine months ago. Of course, this population boom may be a good thing for New Orleans, as it could mean more Saints fans can watch the match on Sunday. I mean, if everyone in Minnesota has a baby, they obviously can not attend the game, which means more tickets for Saints fans. More babies also means more potential customers for the application I'm going to invent. This is called BabyChat. This is Snapchat for babies. I can not believe anyone in Silicon Valley has not thought of that yet.
Whatever it is, I am almost sorry for the residents of New Orleans this week since you are going to have to attend about 400 reruns of the Minneapolis Miracle from here on Sunday. I mean, let's be real, the real miracle will be if you spend the next five days without seeing a single repetition of the hit.
Another miracle will be if the saints can really slow down Adam Thielen. Thielen terrorized the opposition's defenses this year and tied an NFL record by scoring at least 100 yards less in seven straight games to start a season. He now has to go back to the Saints defense, which is ranked 28th overall in the NFL.
Although I think Thieien will show big numbers, the Vikings defense will go from a rookie quarterback of week 6 (Josh Rosen) to a rookie quarterback of week 7 (Sam Darnold) to DREW BREES of week 8. C is as if kitten to adopt an adult cheetah. It's a big fit.
The Saints lost literally on a miracle last season and, from what I know of miracles, you usually do not get more than one per life. So I will say that the Vikings have no miracle on Sunday and the saints. leave Minnesota with a win. Plus, all babies born in Minneapolis this week become fans of Saints. By the way, whatever you do this weekend, do not agree to play a game involving drinking whenever the miracle of Minneapolis is presented because I do not want anyone to die.
The choice: Saints 26-23 on the Vikings
Choice of the 8th week of the NFL: everything else
Texans 23-13 on dolphins
Redskins 24-17 on the giants
Bears 27-20 over Jets
Heads 38-24 on Broncos
23-20 Seahawks on Lions
Bengals 27-17 on the buccaneers
Steelers 30-20 on the Browns
Ravens 22-19 on Panthers
49ers 19-16 on the cardinals
Patriots 31-17 on the bills
BYES: Falcons, Cowboys, Titans, Chargers
Last week
Best choice: Last week, I predicts that buccaneers beat the Browns by three, then the Buccaneers came out and beat the Browns by three. Now, did I know that the Browns would come back from a two-touch deficit in the second half, only to lose the game on a 59-yard overtime play? Of course I did it. I mean, these are the Browns we are talking about.
Whenever I make a prediction on a Browns game, I usually assume that nothing is going to happen normally and that it will most likely end with an excruciating loss of Browns, which will be immediately followed by Hue Jackson who says something that does not happen. Makes no sense during his post-game press conference. The absurd statement of Jackson this week is that he will involve more in the offense.
If I had to make a list of all the ways the Browns could improve, trading against Blake Bortles and / or signing the Possally of the rally to serve as a part-time mascot would be to make Jackson more involved in the game. offense. The last time Jackson was involved in the offense was the whole of the 2017 season, during which he was called on to play. By chance, the Browns won zero games that year. I guess it was not a coincidence.
Worst choice: Every week it seems to me that I'm making at least one choice that defies logic, and last week it was choosing the Cardinals to beat the Broncos. My series of correct selections in every game of the West NFC West has escalated over the flames. If these flames occurred at the MetLife stadium, every car would have caught fire.
The worst part of my choice of Cardinals is that I knew that my series was over before the game started. As soon as Von Miller came out, he announced that the Broncos were going to kick Arizona's ass. It was therefore impossible for Denver to win at least three touchdowns.
We all agree that if an All-Pro defensive player promises to hit another team's ass, there is a 100% chance that it will happen and I will change my choice accordingly.
Finally, if you have ever wondered which teams I am really good at choosing, it is at this time of year that I start sharing this inside information with you. In seven weeks, I'm always perfect to choose three teams: Rams (7-0), Seahawks (6-0) and 49ers (7-0). I am also 6-1 by choosing Cardinals, Chargers, Patriots and Bills.
Regarding this bad case against the spread, I have an excuse: I want the Packers (0-6), the Lions (1-5), the Panthers (1-5), the Redskins (1- 5) and the Broncos). I'm just 4-26 in total by choosing these five teams against the spread, and as you can imagine, it's really embarrassing for my style.
Record of choice
Directly in the 7th week: 8-6
Global SU: 68-37-2
Against the spread of week 7: 4-9-1
TTY in general: 46-57-4
Exact score forecast: 2
You can find John Breech on Facebook or Twitter and If he's not doing any of these things, he's probably trying to find an exchange for Jon Gruden's office.
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