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According to an Alzheimer's Association survey, sibling family battles are among the most common sources of stress and stress for caring for elderly parents with dementia.
Here are some tips for families struggling to care for a loved one with dementia:
Planning: A person with dementia can complete the legal guidelines after the diagnosis if his judgment and decision-making are still intact, according to the Alzheimer's Association. Living wills and other legal documents can help guide end-of-life decisions.
Without such planning, families often disagree about the level of care for a loved one.
"Family members can really struggle to figure out what to do," says Ruth Drew, director of information and support services for the Alzheimer's Association.
Remote families: Siblings from different cities or states sometimes tend to guess the family members who live closest to a loved one with dementia. A common scenario: a brother or sister out of the state goes on a short time and tries to remedy the situation.
This can create tension between the visitor and the person providing the daily care.
"People who live far away can feel guilty," says Drew. "It is not uncommon for someone to come to town, assess the situation and make many suggestions. They can walk on the feet of people who are already there. "
Drew said that families who communicate and share responsibility can avoid such problems. A family member, for example, could be more comfortable with paying his bills and managing the finances of an elderly loved one. Others can take charge of the practical care and get to the doctor's appointment.
More: The hidden face of dementia: families argue over care, end-of-life decisions, finances, successions
More: CDC: Alzheimer's disease and doubling cases of dementia by 2060
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Technology: Many family members caring for loved ones have turned to social media and apps for help. The online community Lotsa Helping Hands uses an online calendar that allows health care providers to record requests for tasks such as preparing meals or traveling for medical appointments. The Care Zone app allows users to manage their medications, request pharmacy renewals or even subscribe to Medicare plans.
Financial aid: Although emotional and physical stress is the main concern, 69% of caregivers worry about the financial burden of caring for a loved one, according to the Alzheimer's Association. Medicare does not pay for home caregivers, but there may be other community resources. All communities in the United States have designated a regional agency on aging, which provides programs and services for seniors. You can search for your local agency here.
Respite careThe duty to care is often the responsibility of a spouse or a child and they often feel overwhelmed. According to the Alzheimer's Association, four in five caregivers want more help from family members.
AARP recommends that caregivers make a list of friends and family who can provide alternative care. Another option: Organize a family reunion and emphasize the importance of giving an occasional break to a caregiver.
The Federal Older Americans Act provides limited funding for respite, referral and counseling services. Contact your local agency about aging for more information.
Sources: Alzheimer's Association, AARP and Department of Health and Social Services
More: The Long Goodbye, Part 1: After the dementia sets in, Mom and her daughter make some more memories
More: The Long Goodbye, Part 2: When dementia sets in, the "new normal" is no longer normal at all
More: The Long Goodbye, Part 3: What we learned about dementia and what we face
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