Breast reconstruction is not a "free gain job"

Barbara Tako is a breast cancer survivor (2010), a melanoma survivor (2014) and author of Adaptation Tools for Cancer Survival – We will help you get through this. She is a cancer advocate, a speaker, and a published author for television, radio, and other places across the country. She lives, survives and thrives in Minnesota with her husband, children and dog. See more at www.cancersurvivorshipcopingtools.com, or www.clutterclearingchoices.com.

If I hear from another person who tells a breast cancer survivor that she is "lucky" to land a "free job", I could start banging my head against a wall – literally. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. but comments like this make me wonder how aware we are. Yes, I am sensitive to this because the parts of my body formerly called "Barb's breasts" are being rebuilt. Underwear, the ultimate results will look "normal", but they will be senseless for the rest of my life and may require future surgeries. Seriously. Is it a "free" job?

Many women who have a diagnosis of breast cancer or a genetic mutation that is likely to increase their risk of contracting breast cancer face difficult choices: is it wise to have a double mastectomy? And do I want to go flat or rebuild? Yes I want a reconstruction, what kind? These are difficult, heartbreaking and very tedious choices that are not made lightly or easy to make. Survival is the goal. Appearances are secondary. Most of us (breast cancer survivors or breast cancer patients) simply want to melt into the pack and live our lives as quickly and as normally as possible.

Cancer-related breast reconstruction is not a free boob job. The goal is to have something that mixes easily and normally under clothing. Whoever rebuilt, with its scars, numbness, and sometimes persistent pain, can not win a beauty contest. We just want a version of normal again.

The permanent implants I got a few weeks ago seem to be more comfortable than the tissue expanders that they have replaced. I am grateful to be able to heal and have less pain now than a few weeks ago. It's a relief to complain about these little things: discomfort and difficulty sleeping at night, and minor differences, but that maybe we can correct, between my left sides and right now.

Still, simple questions like why I need a nap or why a vacation with friends or family should be scheduled to fall at a different time because another operation becomes interesting. I want to be honest with the people of my life, but I worry about IMT (too much information). Part of that comes from what I'm reluctant to say. That's partly because they probably do not really want to hear it, and I do not blame them!

Is plastic surgery stigmatized? May be? Breast cancer survivors choose him in search of normal. It was not fun to wait for the hair to grow back after chemotherapy, and it's not fun to suffer the pain of many plastic surgeries for having fake breasts. Breast cancer survivors desperately want to be normal. We want to blend in with the human package – seem to be like everyone else. When "foobs" are involved, the process is long and sometimes painful. This often involves several surgeries, not just one.

Breast reconstruction is not something I am comfortable sharing and it is not always a process that other people are comfortable hearing about . Even after surviving breast cancer and melanoma, I still find myself in unknown waters. Breast reconstruction is a unique delusional experience and I'm lucky to have it as a tool to help me get back to a normal life, but it's not a "free job".