Gisele Bündchen reveals that she considered the years of suicide

Gisele Bundchenpublic life may have always seemed perfect, but she struggled against a world of pain.

In his new memoir Lessons: my way to a meaningful life, whose release is scheduled for October 2, the world's most successful supermodel, the wife of Tom Brady and a mother of two talks about her mental health struggles. She reveals that 15 years ago, while her career was taking off, she experienced her first panic attack on a bumpy plane ride. This led her to develop a fear of tunnels, elevators and other enclosed spaces. She then had more panic attacks, including at home, and eventually considered suicide.

"In fact, I've had the feeling:" If I just jump off my balcony, it'll end, and I never have to worry about this feeling of my world getting closer " said Bündchen. People in the comments posted Wednesday.

She said she had sought the help of a professional and that she had been prescribed Xanax, but she did not want to trust the medication. Bündchen then decided to change his eating habits and drink and turn to yoga and meditation to fight against stress. The model and her husband are known today for their strict but healthy diet.

"I smoked cigarettes, drank a bottle of wine and three mocha Frappucinos every day and gave up everything in one day," she said. People. "I thought that if this thing is in no way the cause of this pain in my life, we have to go."

She also did an examination of conscience and in 2005 she broke up with Leonardo DiCaprio after five years.

"Things may seem perfect on the outside, but you have no idea what's really going on," said the model People. "I felt maybe it was time to share some of my vulnerabilities, and I realized that everything I had lived, I would never change, because I think I am what I am because of these experiences."

If you or someone you know needs help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).