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Last October, Monica Lewinsky debuted a P.S.A., “In Real Life,” in partnership with BBDO New York and Dini von Mueffling Communications. The video, which went on to be nominated for an Emmy, featured actors reciting cyberbullying posts to show the power of hurtful online words. Nearly a year later, Lewinsky is back with another P.S.A. that’s an equally effective gut punch.
In this video, famous people are called by the names they have been called online: Lena “the Whiny Fat Cu–” Dunham; John Oliver, also known as “Total Bitch Loser”; “The Useless” Alan Cumming. Presented under the hashtag “#DefyTheName,” the video promotes the idea that name-calling, no matter where it’s done, can stay with the target for years. Bullying, as Lewinsky told Vanity Fair, even happened last week in the Senate hearings.
The P.S.A. this year is a little more interactive. It asks that people change their online name to whatever they have been called by bullies. And Lewinsky is not sitting this one out: for the month of October, she will take on the name Monica “Chunky Slut Unmarryable That Woman” Lewinsky. Here’s why.
Vanity Fair: It’s been almost a year since your “In Real Life” P.S.A. debuted. How does this one move the work forward?
Monica Lewinsky: Whereas last year’s campaign focused on asking people to rethink their online behavior, with a secondary note about the positive impact of being an upstander instead of a bystander, this year #DefyTheName is focused on the targets of bullying behavior—both in the P.S.A. and in the ask of people to change their display name on social media to include their bullied name.
How did the celebrities in the campaign get involved? Whose passion for the project surprised you?
Almost everyone involved in the P.S.A. is someone whom I know personally—though maybe just virtually. This made it both wonderful and stressful as I felt especially responsible for making sure they were comfortable while also being mindful of how busy everyone is.
Anyone who is in the P.S.A. is passionate about making a change with this issue. Even with the vignettes where we just had name approval there was a time investment on their part. I’m so grateful to all of those who participated. We may have a surprise video later in the month from someone who I was shocked to learn was bullied as a kid—but his schedule is tight though he cares about this issue. I’ll keep you posted!
Did they pick these childhood taunts themselves?
Yes, they did. Some gave us a few from which to choose.
What is it about a P.S.A. that feels particularly powerful? Is it the fact that everyone is on YouTube now and that’s how things are seen, or is there something in particular about the actual filmmaking?
I don’t know about other P.S.A.s or agencies, but having worked with BBDO N.Y. two years in a row, I can tell you one of the ingredients that has made our P.S.A.s powerful is how much they care about this issue and are dedicated to the work. We have all, including DVM Communications, worked hundreds and hundreds of hours pro bono on this campaign because we all care about this issue—how it’s affecting people, particularly young people now—and how we want to see this bullying behavior curbed for future generations.
P.S.A.s may also be having a moment because we’re so thirsty for truth and ways to feel like we’re making a difference. Some of the best P.S.A.s are the most impactful kinds of storytelling.
How have the conversations you have with people around bullying changed since you first started doing this work?
Many of us focused on this issue and in this space have worked to talk about the bullied experience in ways that help to de-stigmatize it. This is important because it is often the stigma that causes shame and then prevents people from reaching out to the others, which I think is the most dangerous—suffering in silence.
It’s also changed in the several years as the discourse online devolved, becoming more and more caustic. More people understand its importance as a social and mental-health topic.
It’s been an exhausting few weeks of news, with Dr. Christine Blasey Ford’s incredible composure in the face of relentless harassment as one of the few bright spots. Obviously no one should have to endure what she has, but do you see her as a model for putting up with some of the most extreme kinds of bullying?
Absolutely. Dr. Blasey Ford was bullied and yet still chose to do the brave thing in testifying.
How has the Kavanaugh news cycle felt for you personally?
Just like for many other people in our country, it’s been an emotional time for me. I wasn’t able to watch the hearings to take care of myself emotionally (we were also shooting part of the PSA that day which was a better focus for me.)
For a lot of people, the best response to online harassment is to simply back away, but you’ve stuck with your work, and sometimes even respond to people who attack you on Twitter. What gives you the strength to keep that up?
I utilize all available safeties for what I see on social media. If a platform offers up a new tool, I’m on it! I’m also a huge fan of blocking. But in general, I try (though not always successfully) to practice neutral compassion online—to de-personalize the vitriol being spewed at me and remind myself this person is probably suffering more than me. Really, who yells or says cruel things to a stranger?! (Also me: hello, drafts folder!)
Will you change your display name, and if yes, to what?
There were a lot to choose from, but thankfully Twitter only allows you 50 characters! My name for October will be Monica “Chunky Slut Stalker That Woman” Lewinsky. (No monogrammed presents, please.)
It was recently announced that you participated in a docuseries being exec-produced by Alex Gibney and directed by Blair Foster for A&E. Did preparing for that help you think of names?
Sadly, yes. Living through 1998 was one thing. Digging deep and preparing for these interviews was another layer of pain and working through my good old friend shame.
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