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Wilfrido Vargas
"I'm anxious, I'm disoriented, I'm depressed," admits Vargas. But "I still managed to build and manage a musical career worthy and rich in achievements."
Country blessed! Blessed city! Happy taxi! I was in the right place! S exclaimed Wilfrido Vargas euphoric after the recording of "El africano".
I had heard his first lines in a cab: the black man was angry, he had told his father she was going to lie down quietly, but this black idiot discovered her.
At this point, the musician was already alert. However, when he heard the big question of the song: Mom, what would the black want? He knew that he had something in hand: one of the great dance hymns of Latin American festivals of the 80s.
The success was repeated also with "The Abuse", but for this release, the euphoria was far away, he could not even pose for the cover photo of the album. I was in the field, suffering from depression.
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In his autobiography, Vargas speaks openly about the mood disorders that he has been suffering since his childhood.
That's what he says in his autobiography "You've made me crazy, Wilfrido", in which he speaks openly of his serious mood disorders, which mark him since childhood: "Cold, tremors, fever, bipolarity, panic, depression – words that I 'm I got to know a lot about myself a different boy the rest. "
Wilfrido Vargas (Santo Domingo, 1949), is in Hay Cartagena with his music and his history of entertainment, but also therapies and medicines. "I am anxious, disoriented, depressed, and yet I have managed to build and manage a worthy, rich career in achievements.
Why do you decide to reveal your weaknesses and talk about "what you wear under the skin"?
In an interview with the media, human beings tend to show the best part of their image, those smiles up to the ears, all is happiness, and whoever does not risk jeopardizing its possibilities and aspirations.
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With his book, Vargas wants to inspire hope and help suffering readers like him.
It seems that the bad ones, the sufferings and the tortures were so taboo that it means that you are the bad guy, you the executioner, but you are the one who receives these things.
This book tells unspeakable things and wants to help the reader so that I can also say, I hope, is morality, the goal.
Many people suffer from the same problems as you, anxiety disorders, mood swings, depression.
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But it seems that the word psychiatrist or the word drug is pornographic, because everything is fine for them. Then you come across the news that such a man has committed suicide or that a famous singer has been found in the bathroom bleeding.
Have you ever considered suicide?
Never in life, I laugh. The book is precisely so that people who suffer from 5% of what I count do not collapse.
Accounts that "before the loss of energy the same man nice and extrovert, suddenly became sullen: a trunk that barely breathes". How is this experience?
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Wilfrido Vargas
For Vargas, suicide has never been an option.
There are things that Spanish is not ready to express, because if you hurt yourself to a tooth or a foot, you say that I have toothache or that I'm I have a broken foot. But when you lie down like stones, it is very hard to bear.
And there are two cases. One where you simply feel that you are lying, but without symptoms; and another in which you lie, but with an endless series of symptoms that you can not express with words, because they have no definition, what you feel in a major depression.
How was your case?
In the state because since my birth, I have had problems. It is a condition.
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When you know the enemy, it is easier, you know how he is calling and that other people are suffering. But you can not go to the police to complain about the anxiety, put it in jail and get rid of it, because it's been cruel to you, because that same anxiety may have been needed to do all that. that I did.
And how did you intimidate her?
These disorders are afraid of determination, habits. They are afraid of dignity, of assertiveness, they underestimate your intelligence. Then you have several ways to do it, because over the years you've discovered how it's done, how it's done, how it behaves, and how you make notes.
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"When you know the enemy, it 's easier, you know how he calls and what else is undergoing him.
I have written the book as an open key and I am a patient of what is called the oscillation of the mind. When I contact the trance state that makes me write, the symptoms disappear.
Do the stage and the music help you too?
And if I told you that, on the occasion, every applause was an arrow that pierces my heart and hurts me a lot, because I can not stand the noise, I can not stand the approval. What I have inside can not be cured by these applause, quite the opposite.
But there is a contract, they announce to Wilfrido Vargas, what should I do? Should I go to each of the participants at Madison Square Garden to explain what is happening? It is therefore impossible that this is called determination.
How did your neighbors, your family, and your children experience them?
They do not know anything, they feel it because they see you lying down and you can not get up. They know about depression briefly, but the state of major depression does not allow you to seek help from anyone, you do not exist.
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I've been a bit apathetic when it comes to reuniting the family, I've never done it. They will say that if he did not touch the subject, we could hurt him more if we asked him questions. A question is an injury? It's a bullet in the head.
But now that you have read the book, you will not be indifferent to everything you say.
The book has not reached my country yet. And I do not know what the mess is waiting for, because I wrote it without permission from my family. But I had to say it.
You talk about your origins and your loves, the mothers of your five children. Accounts that you have always loved inaccessible women, what kind of woman is this?
If you are a carajito, as they say in the Dominican Republic, a poor little boy very insignificant who has never seen four cars at the same time, because in Altamira there were only two, and he looks at the dean of the Faculty of Physics Autonomous University, You must be crazy to pretend.
It's inaccessible. I loved these challenges and I had to defeat them, it was for me a good thing because it fed the ego, it stimulated.
Does the ego have bad press?
I hear a lot of unauthorized people who speak badly of the ego, writing as specialists, saying to give up the mind. For psychiatrists to go home, we will put them in jail, they have scammed us throughout the history of the science of humanity.
According to your stories, your own therapists came to say that you have become an expert in the mind.
I know how it works. I tell you something? Wilfrido Vargas who started talking to you is not that one. My cyclothymic problem is so fast that you do not talk to him anymore.
At first, I made a big effort, but it's already gone and I'm happy. Then we learn the tricks and we finally understand. What if I told you that depression also has its charm?
You say that "happiness has nothing to do with euphoria, frenzy, ecstasy or celebration, but rather with the breath without thinking about its existence".
It is the absence of worry, of that feeling that does not let you sleep, because happiness gives you the qualification of the quality of sleep: you sleep peacefully or sleep without rest.
I do not have any economic problems and do you think that makes me happy? I am a developed artist, do you think that makes me happy? I lack nothing of the things that have the reputation of being instruments of happiness, but I laugh, you are happy when you are calm.
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Vargas says that he never told his family that he was suffering from depression.
As for your successful artistic career, after your experience, how would you say that a musical hit is made?
I've told the story of each of the songs, but I have not tried to answer that question, there is no setting, it's flexible, it's That's why I like the word smell, you have the intuition that something could be loved.
If I go in a cab and I hear "Mom, I'm going to bed softly, I'm standing on my head and the black guy is discovering me", so I say "What's up?" passed here? and then concludes, "Mom, what does the black want?" I laughed, this caught my attention, then I told the driver to come back, we will look for this disc.
And what will black want? When we heard it in Chile in the 80s, I shoutedaWe were "QPinochet, come on!. ¿Syou open?
Of course, that happened at a concert, but I did not understand and stopped the song, I thought that they wanted me to leave, and then they explained to me.
You sing to a abusadora, but now the most victims of abuse are the men of the #metoo movement.
This is one of the greatest discoveries that has been made in terms of what is known as the phenomenon of harassment, because as it is fashionable, no one wants to fall into this situation. The one who previously had no voice, now, because he's watching this phenomenon on TV. That's the best thing that has happened.
Is it true that when you heard "bilirubin" Juan Luis Guerra you almost lost consciousness?
For me it was an aggression and a lack of respect for my ego because I had never heard of this quality. I admired him so much that I stopped the car on the right and started to sweat.
Do you remember the fight between Tyson and Douglas? Until then, no one had dealt such a blow to Tyson. Before "The Bilirubin", nothing made me tremble.
That's why you get to work and you create "Puppy dancing", another continental success?
I had no way of answering Juan Luis Guerra. Then I looked for the same musicians who did "The bilirrubina", to make a children's song, a bit controversial because it speaks of the grace that two puppies do when mating, and when that went out, it was an atomic bomb.
Could it have been the precursor of perreo?
People say you just said and they also say that "the gardener" could be the reggaeton platform, while before "El Jardinero" did you hear a rap hinting at hip-hop in the tropical music?
This article is part of the digital version of Hay Festival Cartagena, a meeting of writers and thinkers that takes place in this city Colombian between him January 31 and the 3 of February of 2019.
- Read our coverage of the Hay Festival of Cartagena
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