[ad_1]
OPINION: I am not one to make big statements on the fly (I am, in fact, I do it all the time, boldly and without further reflection), but here is what I think is true: the plants of Inside, we ruin our lives.
In recent years, they have become the unofficial symbol of semi-successful status: the more plants you have, the happier you are, the better your life.
Of course, none of us can afford a property, but if your rented lounge looks like Jumanji, you have to do something good.
I was admirably admired as friends effortlessly quoted the Latin names of their plants, their ego magnifying at each 'Sansevieria trifasciata'.
READ MORE:
* The bigger it is, the better it is: The best trends in indoor plants for 2019
* The trendiest indoor plants to add to your home
* How to choose the right indoor plant for difficult places
GET YOUR GREEN CARD
As with any movement that is rapidly gaining popularity, I'm instinctively careful – no one wants to be the last person to have a Kabbalah bracelet. But I am also tired of being left out of debate about whether philodendrons will flourish in the sun.
And so two weeks ago, I found myself in a local indoor plant store. Side note: Living in downtown Sydney, there are more indoor plant stores than needed. I was able to choose between three nearby, finally opting for the closest. I can more easily access a hibiscus than a hospital.
Upon arrival, I was greeted by a friendly store employee who asked me what I was after.
"An indoor plant," I replied, he smiled. A few minutes later, I was holding a fig with violin leaves (Ficus lyrata).
UNSPLASH
For some of us, the pressure of being a man of the plant is too strong.
FIDDLY Little
While he was preparing my violin, the attendant drew up a long list of contradictory instructions.
"Give it a little light, but not too much."
"Keep it near a window, but not near the window."
"Water your fiddle sheet, but do not water it too much.The leaves will turn brown if they are too dry, they will also become wet if they are too wet."
And then the kicker.
"Although they may be difficult, they are so rewarding when they receive the proper care."
You and me, violin sheet.
The bad seed
Once the factory was in his new home, I sent a photo to my friends. Everyone was so supportive and it was nice. This was going to be the beginning of a new me, I was a person from the factory now, and I was wondering what else could change.
Would I open a bottle of wine without feeling the need to finish it? Maybe I would visit art galleries for more than just the gift shop.
Three days later, I felt the first betrayal: the crunch of a brown leaf that had separated from the plant.
I could not bring myself to ask my friends for help; Having recently obtained their approval, my failure on the violin was an immediate source of shame. Instead, I did some research online and spent the next week testing all the possible theories: move the plant with the sun, close the windows at night, wipe the leaves every hour. Nothing worked.
In the meantime, my research on the Internet has only served to confirm my theory that the plant-plant was unstoppable. I've read articles on university courses devoted to indoor planting, stumbled upon the Melbourne Jungle Collective, an organization that "organizes pop-up parties for indoor plants in our warehouse." bohemian style while the DJs play on the site.
The hipsters and horticulturists had become the same; I felt like neither one nor the other.
cheekbone
But the strangest thing that I discovered online was that I was not alone. There were forums full of people like me (plant killers), going crazy trying to revive their inner disappointments. A particularly sad message has well described the collective atmosphere.
"Guys, I need your help, my friends come for dinner and my fiddle sheet is awkward! She is brown and drooping and nothing works. What can I try, ??????
Nothing told me more than this series of desperate question marks. With each fallen leaf, I also felt my status slipping, while everyone around me continued to gloat about their flourishing interior gardens.
Instagram was a continuous stream of lush photos accompanied by exuberant and optimistic legends. "Did you know that studies conducted by NASA have revealed that indoor plants can reduce stress and improve our mood!"
DEFORESTATION
It was new to me. I was more stressed than ever and perpetually in a bad mood. I started having visions about waking up in a room filled with angry friends, surrounded by fallen leaves.
Eventually, I conceded that the Fig-Jig was up and I handed the violin to a new owner. Despite the desperation of seeing what is going on for me (and for so many others online), the pressure to be a man of the plant was too strong.
"Anything that makes us feel better does not do us any good," writes the modern philosopher (and probably the green thumb), Alain de Botton. "All that hurts can not be bad."
So I will take my sterile living room, free of everything, including chess.
– Executivestyle.com.au
[ad_2]
Source link