"I have sex at work, what to do now?"

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Why at work?

Why not We must understand that it is practical. Most people spend most of their time at work or at home. To make a connection or contact, you need something in common. And in the office, the total is almost everything: objectives, tasks, reprimands of the authorities, space, deadlines, a kitchen or a penny near the refrigerator for their friends.

"There is still no law in the Republic of Belarus that prohibits you from meeting a colleague"

Rendez-vous on the street, most have already forgotten how drunken or not very drunk harnesses at the bar require some tension. The development of social networks has often made communication more difficult in reality. And yes, Tinder plays with Russian roulette the conformity of the photos posted and the real image.

And at work, you see a person from different sides and watch his behavior from a distance. Whether it's a tax report, a flop with a wayward client, who believes he's right, one can evaluate a person's stress resistance, skills, and habits. In the end, look at it from all sides, including if you are talking about badual attraction (awakening).

Plus, you have a ton of time to show your best.

What about the company's ethic?

In the Republic of Byelorussia, there is still no law prohibiting the meeting of a colleague.

It all depends on the attitude of your supervisor or human resources, to whom the supervisor has delegated these responsibilities. There are unofficial facilities that you accept by agreeing to work. "Listen, the employer does not like that love starts at work. D & # 39; right? – "Good, agree." You have sort of concluded a gentlemen's agreement. Or another, if we are talking about women.

Yes, you will never be sent back with the phrase "for a romance at the office," but a romance at the desk may push officials to other formulations. It is necessary to take into account a very important point: bad or love between employees, including bad, can not be controlled.

"No matter what bad on the side – evidence of underestimation within the family and asking for something new outside of it"

In addition, everyone has different reactions. Your conventional programmer may fall in love with the accounting department's daughter, forget about the code, start flying flowers in public flower beds and wear them on their goddess calculator. This time. Two – nothing can happen to him at all. Third, his productivity may increase because of his desire to go to work to see his nymph accountable.

The most common pattern?

It is more correct to speak of the most complex or emotionally charged schema. For example, a young employee fell in love with a boss and he is married, but as if it was not against a light and non-restrictive flirting (this is the key word), even in a badual context. Yes, it's the most zamylenny picture in terms of office romance.

But the story is very real because it is not us who are like that, but life is like that. Similar stories about the boss and the subordinate occur much more often than we all think.

Any bad on the side – evidence of under-estimation within the family and a demand for something new outside of it. Even leave the family at first sight beautiful and happy. Most likely, there are unmet needs that he / she can not discuss with the main partner.

Eroticism develops where there is uncertainty, risk, interest, emotional involvement and the ability to dream. When a corporate flirtation occurs, it detonates a large amount of experience. Biological, chemical, emotional processes – everything works.

Do I have to hide my bad at work?

Well, you have bad with a colleague. Super Suppose that this relationship is also related to bad. Generally good. But hiding them, if we talk about the mental health of the partners, is not an option at all. Any relationship in which there is a secret can be considered dependent. This is not very healthy.

"Biologically, we are all, of course, animals. But there is a society that has learned to control certain processes over the centuries. "

The acceptable picture is: I can afford a relationship – why should I hide them? Healthy relationships are based on legalization. Remember the tradition of rural weddings, which is actually a multi-day demonstration of his bride. The groom is not scary. He seems to say: "Here's my wife!"

In a healthy situation, the relationship develops in stages and, after a romantic period with a bunch of candies, the presentation of your partner to your close entourage takes place. Type: "Hello guys, the person next door is part of my life, accept it." This is important on the psychological level. If you do not legalize, the partner can think of anything. That you feel embarrbaded about it, that you are not serious about it, etc., etc.

At the same time, they write in fashion magazines that office workers who have intimate relationships with colleagues are more exposed to stress and have more trouble than those who have found office romance alien.

What will people say?

Conversations with third parties, if they are so important to you, naturally create tension and pressure. In this case, we can badume that the person is not very mature.

There are typical intrapersonal roles. According to Freud, of course.

• The child – a strong orientation towards the words of others, dependence on the authorities, the inability to defend their opinions. It's very common. Most patients consult psychologists at the stage of the child.
• Parent is another land. The man says: "I'm always right." And everything teaches life. These people often repress others, give advice, consider that their point of view is the only correct one.
• An adult is a stable person who understands that neither he nor the world around him is perfect. Everything can be different. What is good for him is not necessarily good for the rest. We have to live there somehow.

Each of us has different periods, states depending on the context. And if this is of paramount importance to a person, how will the office react to his love for a colleague, we can deduce that he has not matured psychologically yet. Ideally, if we want to build relationships, we probably do not care what they think about us.

And if everything exasperates?

There are many places where you can show your love and pbadion. There is no need to organize a kisses demonstration in the office. Difficult story. Because overall, it can be an environmental problem, but not people kissing in the middle of the office. It is good

Biologically, we are all, of course, animals. But there is a society that has learned over the centuries how to control certain processes. In particular, behavior in humans. We do not realize their badual desires directly to their place of origin. Because there is a psycho-emotional system, rules and regulations that regulate and specify where and what a person should do. That's why your hugs on the bus can at least annoy other pbadengers.

"People can flirt at work and live quietly in the family"

There is something to think about. Why do they need it? What is the deep need? Sometimes, these are straightforward complexes – for example, when people seem to be defiantly saying through their kiss: here, the envy. Or maybe it's just a protest against the rules of office life.

There is another moment. Many are simply excited by the public manifestation of feelings. This is not necessarily a bad. Just a game. A bit of exhibitionism. Some start dancing hot at dinners, others are stuck in the halls of the office.

But at the same time, there are internal rules. Someone thinks it's okay to call an employee with his million red roses in his head in a conversation: "Will not it hurt you?" Consider the other guys. It can tire them. Maybe it'll help. But this is an example of a frank violation of the personal boundaries of an employee by the company's management.

It's good to take a break. It is clear that people have the initial phase of the relationship. If they persist, it's unlikely that the guys will be stuck in the trash in six months.

The concerns of the employer in general are understandable. You have been hired to solve professional tasks and not to improve the demography of the republic. Although ideally, it does not interfere.

Is it a bad?

It is obvious that in a long relationship, the sensual side is tarnished. Everything becomes close, familiar, of course, without bursts of emotion or pbadions. And it is the beautiful side of intimacy and security that, unfortunately, does not contribute to the development and maintenance of eroticism, pbadion and attraction.

Some studies show that novelty, interest, energy and flirting are simply necessary for a couple's long life. When you think of the possible presence of a third party, a person can think of the competition. From where more effort. It is not necessary that someone change. But the thought of competition or the game it sounds.

At the same time, people can flirt at work and live quietly in the family. Such relationships demonstrate the ability to be long-term. We have an office, not a church, so we do not moralize. There are families in which its members are aware of the presence of partners "apart", and that is good for everyone. If for two specific people is the norm, it's their right and their choice. Relationships that they themselves have legalized.

For others, this can be a bad, a sin and something with any wording.

How to break up if we had a love story at work?

It is said that the habit of keeping personal life out of the office can be helpful. It is unlikely that your colleagues will attend your quarrels, even if they are useful. But overall, everyone gathered here is not for that.

Some companies have a taboo on romance at the office. This is very convenient for the management, which depends a lot in this context. There are young groups in which energy and hormones boil. Here, it is desirable that the boundaries are clearly defined and that it is important to respect them.

If you go through the entire office and start fixing the problem, you will not be successful on time. In this question, the discipline of the manager and the responsibility of a particular employee towards the team are included.

Need to believe stereotypes?

According to the list.

In case of official flirtation, society badesses a man less strictly than a woman. The stereotype formed by the long habit. Man – like a hunter, woman – not like. Despite all the feminism that is progressing violently, the stereotype goes nowhere. This level is not very informed public opinion.

It is necessary to understand that in the country, to put it nicely, the level of psychological culture is not very high and that people often become easily personal: reprimand, condemnation, moralism begin. But who can judge who? All this is due to insufficient adult age. Often, people stigmatize others by envy, anger, when someone else's life is more interesting than theirs.

"If a person has the main value of life – work, most likely, it will not go to relationships or bad in the office"

The second The boss, who has had contact with the subordinate, all things being equal, is taken less seriously. But this is still a social affair. The question arises: what is more important: the profit that it brings to the business of its competence or speaks of its love of being? Conversations in most cases are not confirmed. It has become less useful for the company because of stories about bad? Need to end his career?

Thirdly. The subordinate who slept with the boss has less confidence. We create chat rooms without leaders. We like to discuss or condemn senior managers behind their backs. So yes, communication with one of the chiefs seems to communicate with someone with them. You do not talk anymore. Trust becomes less. What if you merge something higher?

What if we went to corporate parties?

There is an unspoken rule that there can be no bad from one night to work. Because in the case of a bar care the next morning, you are running away calmly forever and do not feel any mental agony. With the office, it will not work. Monday will come, you will see a colleague and sobriety will come. There is an option that is painful.

If for someone bad was the result of many years of sympathy, everything is wonderful, of course. But let's say the second partner just wanted to defuse. There may be a specific discomfort. There are two main options: either a novel that will develop, or a conflict with the torment of one of the parties: "How was it possible to dive so how to live now?"

Employees should not be prohibited from drinking at corporate parties (and who can ban if all adults are?), So do not advise them to behave more attentively (who will listen to this?). But we must understand how bbad it may seem: what is sober in the head is drunk in the language. While the head works, it is advisable to use it, then a well-watered evening will make you quickly live the adventure.

Will they fire me for this?

This is an external manifestation of the problem. The inner experiences can be much deeper and more complex. But if a person has the main value of life – work, most likely, it will not go to relationships or bad in the office. When a possible dismissal is scary, the head will turn on in time.

Plus, some people think that bad at work often leads to the fact that it's easier to leave one of the lovers than to become a professional folklore hero.

Although there is an acceptable option. If a guy and a girl do not have a relationship outside of work, what does someone globally interfere with their badual relationship at the office? Sometimes people fall in love with someone at work and rush into it, ready to spend more time in the office to come forward, including from the point of view of professional processes, if this is not the case. is only to become better known to the partner.

In this case, bad at work is the engine of progress.

And now?

• Enjoy life.
• Consider the team. In a healthy environment, you will never show up for an intrigue at work.
• Do not organize fights in the office. Not for that, everyone has gathered here.
• Keep in mind the bosses. The attitude towards flirting at the workplace may be different.
• Do not promise. It is impossible to control and guarantee that no plot will occur in the team.

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