When it comes to Roberto Osuna, the Blue Jays have eliminated

Marissa Stapley is a novelist and former sports journalist

I remember the moment when I learned the allegations of domestic badault against Roberto Osuna of the Blue Toronto Jays: I was sitting in a restaurant with my family one night in early May. 19659005] My 11-year-old son pointed at a banner running at the bottom of the screen behind the bar, where Mr. Osuna's face had appeared. A difficult conversation ensued, made more difficult by the fact that we were decked out with Jays equipment, en route to the baseball stadium, where we watched our defeated Jays succumb to Seattle's James Paxton pitcher Mariners.

"Osuna could be innocent, but he might not be," I said. "Until we know for sure, he should not start, and if he does it before these allegations are resolved, we will not monitor him."

J & # 39; I hoped that I would not have to respect those words. But over the weeks, I found myself thinking about domestic violence in professional sport, and what policies and consequences, or lack thereof, meant for me as a female fan, especially if I had to evaluate at the Center. Rogers, presumably with my kids, to cheer a player with a cloud of violent allegations hanging over his head.

Statistics on domestic violence in Canada are disastrous: a woman is killed by her partner every six years or so. It's hard to get a clear picture of the statistics on domestic violence in professional sport, but the volume of stories that I've read – according to allegations that Aroldis Chapman, a Cincinnati Reds closer to the time, strangled his girlfriend and shot him. a domestic incident, to the distressing video that I watched from MLB prospect Danry Vasquez slapping, then dragging his girlfriend up a staircase – told their own story. I've also noticed a trend: Many of these cases were not tried, not even when there was video evidence. And rarely, the players in question, however violent the accusations against them, were completely excluded from professional sports. It seems that there is always a team ready to take a nose and face a player with a history of partner abuse – which makes me think a lot like in the majors, the talent is more important that integrity.

Like other Jays fans, I did not want the allegations against Mr. Osuna to be true. I wanted to go back to the time when the games often ended with the enigmatic launcher and the puppy Russell Martin playing an endearing game of "hit-knock, who's there?" Before sharing a bridal hug.

On Monday, Mr. Osuna's record was postponed until August 1, four days before the end of his 75-game suspension. Yet, even before that happens, Jays' management announced that as of August 5, their star would be back in the team, greeted by a paternal John Gibbons, who said that "I'm going to be back!" he "loved [le gamin]" 19459028 "Will not punish him", and a general manager, Ross Atkins, who said, "We are leading a baseball team and our goal is to win championships. Roberto could potentially be part of that. "

My team put me in an impossible position as a woman, as a mother, as a human being.I was asked to believe that they knew better.I was asked to return to stadium and collect my hands for a young man whose alleged actions are in direct opposition to one of my closest beliefs: that the alleged victims are to believe.We were asked to listen to the exalted cheers caused by the sight of Mr. Osuna kissing this crucifix that hung around his neck, and I was asked not to ask myself how people in the crowd, or at home, who had been victims of The type of crime that the Launcher was suspected of having committed it could be the cause.And finally, I was asked to allow my children to do the same thing: put this young man on a pedestal, he is no longer clear that it deserves to be on.

So, I've do what many people in the age we live do. I opened my Twitter account and I wrote: "Dear @BlueJays If you wish to welcome Osuna with open arms, I will not participate in another match and I will ask for a refund of all the tickets bought this year.I'm not going to take my kids to a stadium where he's pitching.Thank you in advance, an admirer. "

Later in the day, I noticed dozens of notifications on Twitter. I was called a "crazy feminist". It was said that nobody cared what I thought. I was accused of ignoring the lawfulness of the proceedings, of baduming guilt, and – a much worse crime, it seems, than the alleged domestic violence that was being talked about – was called "bandwagoner". , "Fairweather fan" and someone who knew "

Have I been treated this way because I was a fan of women? Because real fans do not care about life their personal favorite players? Or because the world of sports fandom simply does not have room for anyone who shares my beliefs: that a player accused of violence should sit down until the case is resolved, and / or until it is clear to the fans that, if the charges have merit – as the MLB clearly thinks against M Osuna because she inflicted on her one of the most significant suspensions of domestic violence policy violations in the history of the league – at at least some attempts have been made for rehabilitation and restoration. In reality, the allegations against Mr Osuna could never be proven and Jays fans could find themselves stuck in the gray zone between not guilty and innocent, as many other sports fans have been before . we. In the end, the silence of the alleged victim can be bought with an amicable settlement. It's easy to do it when you earn millions of dollars a year.

I am not comfortable if the silence is mine too. We live in a world where our most vulnerable are abandoned by governments and marginalized by their fellow citizens. In the big picture, professional sports should be the least of my worries – but I can not help but think that if the major leagues are in the spotlight, they too should be the ones that stand up and are fighting for change on behalf of those who can not. There is a reason why NFL players taking a knee have had so much attention. These guys get respect, even if they do not always deserve it. What would happen if a league, or even a single team, adopted a zero tolerance policy on domestic abuse?

By the time I was writing, the troubling history of the violent beating of Buffalo Bills was returning Leos McCoy's ex-girlfriend, the victim of an invasion alleged home, surfaced on social media. Buffalo fans may soon find themselves in the same position as Toronto fans – waiting for details, weighing the moral risks of supporting a player who may have crossed a line, and wondering who to believe.

I do not have clear answers, but I know this: When I watch my son playing baseball, I see him mimic the movements and manners of his favorite players. He looks at these people and because of that, I have no choice but to keep them at the highest possible level. I do not think it's unfair to expect professional athletes to be as above average in their personal as professional lives, to be good citizens like the rest any of us are supposed to do it. I do not ask for a saint who embraces the crucifix. I just do not want my kids' favorite players to be allowed to hurt vulnerable people, and if that's the case, I do not want it to be so unbearable for me to suggest that their careers be entrusted to for an indefinite period. Break

That's why I find the current position of Jays' management on Mr. Osuna so unsatisfactory. I might not be of that opinion if the team had reported that Mr. Osuna's salary losses would be paid into a family violence prevention fund. If the fans had been badured that the team was more committed than ever to educate players about domestic violence, to support their players in every way possible – not just on the pitch, but with a conscience and action in action. mental health, the kind of action stop this kind of thing from occurring with such an alarming frequency.

If nothing changes, I will miss watching the rest of the Jays season and, as has ensured the cacophony of Twitter the other day, nobody will care if I do it do. But I still hope that the team I love will choose to do better. An independent investigation and punishment that does not contain – at least for the fans – any attempt at rehabilitation (beyond the sincere hope that a coach can "turn his life") is as empty as the fans of beer cans sometimes throw on the ground in a rage. Toxic masculinity in sport is a problem because it alienates people – not just female fans like me, but those of us who have been physically abused and feel helpless and scared because of it. I want my team to send a clear message to all fans that domestic violence is not tolerated in professional sports. Until we know for sure that Mr. Osuna is innocent, we should not expect to stand up to encourage his name.

I say that as a true fan of the Blue Jays, a fan of the Blue Jays, a mother, a feminist. and realistic: It will not feel as good as we think to see Mr. Osuna take the field before the air has dissipated. Any victory that he could lead us to will be hollow if the allegations against him are proven. It will not hurt anyone, at least physically, to wait a little longer – until we are sure of him again. It could even make the world – at least sport – start to feel like a better and safer place.