CDC has ‘zombie readiness’ advice in case Nostradamus is right

French philosopher and prophet Michel de Nostradamus is said to have predicted a zombie apocalypse for 2021.

But fear not!

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention backs you up with a set of zombie preparedness tips they’ve maintained for a full decade.

“I wonder why zombies, zombie apocalypse, and zombie readiness keep living or dying dead on a CDC website?” asks the guide, which was developed in 2011 as a marketing gimmick – and an eye-catching gimmick as well.

“It turns out that what started as a tongue-in-cheek campaign to engage new audiences with readiness messages has turned out to be a very effective platform,” the guide continues. “We continue to reach and engage a wide range of audiences on All Hazard Readiness through ‘Zombie Readiness’.”

If, as the performers of Nostradamus’ annual horoscope believe, a zombie invasion is near, then it will be a great time for the CDC.

“Few young: half dead to begin with,” wrote the 16th century astrologer, adding ominously, “Fathers and mothers dead of endless pain / Women in mourning, the monster plague: / The Great One to No Longer Be , everyone at the end.

To prepare for this bloody, carnivorous worst, the CDC’s page has links to various “Zombie Readiness Products,” including a downloadable graphic novel on Zombie Readiness; a printable poster of a person looking at an undead with very dirty fingernails; and tips for educators who want to plan zombie lessons. (Example of a teaching aid: “The threat of the zombie apocalypse is imminent. The mayor’s staff have been compromised, and it’s up to you to write a speech for the mayor informing the community of the action to be taken. you up to the community to do? ”)

The bizarre page on the otherwise dead-serious site was published in May 2011 after the CDC’s communications manager expressed concern about the agency’s reach – and decided that the agency’s very first posts on Twitter and Facebook should be fun.

“We were talking about the hurricane season, which begins June 1. I think about hurricane season, and we put out the same messages every year, and I wonder if people even see these messages, ”CDC rep Dave Daigle told The Atlantic at the time. “We have a great message here about preparedness, and I don’t have to tell you that preparedness and public health aren’t the sexiest topics,”

The page turned out to be so popular that it tripled traffic to the CDC site and crashed its server.

However, real zombie preparers have criticized the CDC’s advice, saying it falls short in a specific way.

“That was one of the first things we got from the zombie mob…“ What guns do you guys recommend? ”Daigle said. “Remember that we are a public health center, so we are not going to recommend weapons … We will leave that to the police.”