Nintendo – we need to talk about your new Labo vehicle video kit



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Recently, Nintendo and I have … gone through things. I could go much further, but we will keep this for a different time. Why? Because we are here today to talk about the announcement of the new Nintendo Labo module, the vehicle kit and, in particular, its promotional video.

For those who do not know it, the Lab is a build-it cardboard system that interacts with the Nintendo switch. This new vehicle kit is the third Labo set (after the robot and the variety bundle) that the company has released. In this one, you make three different controllers for the vehicles in the game: a steering wheel for a car, a joystick for an airplane, and a … thing for a submarine.

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Looked at this? Awesome. Then you will have the same thoughts as me: something is wrong. Horrendously wrong.

Nintendo, you must answer a few questions.

First of all, why this television

The state of this view

Garages by their very nature are cold and windy places filled with dust and wood shavings and d & # 39; oil and paint and debris and odors. They are not a place for expensive equipment. Maybe it's a sign of age. When I was young and carefree and accommodating, putting things wherever I wanted to put them, I now became withered and bitter, wanting the objects to be in the right place.

Seriously, do not put a TV in the garage. It's going to be ruined. Ruined .

Can the owner not destroy the technology? It's an expensive hobby, my friend. And, look, I'm not a parent, but banishing your child to the garage to go play video games does not make me cry the carer of the year. What. East. Happening?

And what kind of people own this garage?

Nah.

I will list some of the things I can see in this shot.

  • Bowling
  • A globe [19659017] A neon palm
  • More gear than anyone could ever need
  • An amplifier, but no speakers
  • A typewriter on the established
  • I think it's a kind of sword there too
  • An old doorbell system that is attached to the wall despite it does not seem functional [19659016] Toy cars, like why are not they in a box?
  • What I can only badume to be a giant nut pot
  • spring

No thanks. I will refuse your invitation for a dinner if that is what your garage looks like.

Also, why is everything badualized?

In fact, it is certainly only me

WHO IS THIS MAN? TELL ME, NINTENDO

This man. Who is he? Where does it come from? I think the video wants you to believe that it is the father of the child, but it is just not possible. Look at this picture above. Look at the expression of the man. And even. No parent has ever done this face to their child. It has not happened and it will not happen. It is impossible. So, I'll ask again, who is this man? This man, who is he? Is he even a man? Or a magical Marks & Spencers manikin in life? Or, and bear with me here, is this just the clue we need to unravel all this weird mystery?

Let's look at the appropriate first shot from in the video:

[19659002] Hmm, strange. Why do we see this brilliant light of dreams, rather than the outside world.

Well, look what happens next:

Note that even though the door is open even wider, you still can not see a thing in the back. The child literally emerges from a celestial whiteness. It's as if the person who was dreaming had no opportunity to imagine what was outside this mystical garage …

So, Nintendo, why did you decide to to make your promotional video about a child victim of a post-traumatic incident?

That's the only logical explanation, let me explain.

Only a young man could think that putting a TV in a garage is a good idea – they have no idea what a decent TV costs. Plus, the weird collection of things all over the room? Certainly the work of a spirit who has never spent time in a functional garage or who has paid attention to what is actually there.

Also, looking at this child, I would say that he's about to puberty, explaining the latent badual imagery that runs throughout the video. This revelation also explicitly explains "100% totally a normal human man" who flies in the video halfway. The imaginary nature of this gentleman, who comes straight from the middle of a Sears catalog, also seems to suggest that this young man has lacked strong male role models in his life.

Then, following this thread to its logical conclusion, the child in the video has a very likely hallucination after the car he was in was struck by a plane carrying a submarine

, Nintendo, why?

Seriously, why?

Look, I'm # For companies that print their promotional material with a little more artistic talent, but, Nintendo, you know it's a bit dark, right? You're supposed to be a family company, not a Lars von Trier movie.

I will not be able to sleep tonight.

If you want to support more this kind of art, the vehicle Labo The kit will be released on September 14 and will cost you $ 70. If you want one of the previous Labo kits, you can get the variety here and the robot here. You want a switch to use them? So go here my friend.

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