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Dear Amy: My partner and I are two middle aged men who met later in life.
One of us (me) loves air conditioning, especially since most places I’ve lived in my life lacked it. My partner doesn’t like air conditioning and only uses it when it is very hot outside.
When I moved into his house, I paid for the installation of the central air conditioning. He paid for the solar panels on the roof, which cover more than the electricity we use.
But we seem to be constantly fighting over setting the thermostat. He’s cold when I set it to my favorite temperature, I’m hot when he sets it to his.
I say it’s easier for him to put on a flannel shirt and sweatpants than it is for me to endure the indignity of walking around the house in my underwear.
It seems a little petty to complain about it, because otherwise we are very compatible, but we fail to find a happy place in this conflict.
Can you think of a fair way to solve this problem?
– Sweating in San Diego
Dear sweating: People who heat their homes during the winter tend to keep their indoor temperatures between 68 and 72 degrees (unless you’re my sister, who tells all visitors to her Maine home to keep their down jackets on).
However, if you set your air conditioner to a comfortable winter temperature of 68-70 degrees, you would be cold enough as air conditioners project icy airflows (setting below 70 could actually freeze your air conditioning system).
The US Department of Energy recommends setting your AC thermostat to 78 degrees, although somewhere between 74 and 78 may be best for you. You can reduce humidity by using a dehumidifier and use ceiling fans to circulate this cold air.
I maintain that a lot of people are influenced by the number they see on the thermostat. One way to test this would be for you and your partner to find a compromise by setting the thermostat to “blind”, where either of you cannot see the number on the thermostat. You might find a great place where both of you are comfortable.
But let’s just state that you and him have drastically different body temperature needs. Ideally, you should shoot for him by wearing a long sleeve T-shirt and pants and you a short sleeve T-shirt and shorts.
Otherwise, yeah, I agree with you (and my sister) that it’s easier to warm up with extra clothes than to cool off by getting rid of it.
Dear Amy: I am invited to my niece’s wedding in Arizona in August.
I am fully vaccinated, but the wedding will be indoors and the guests will be maskless.
I have no idea how many other people will be fully vaccinated, but I’m guessing maybe 50%? I know it won’t be 100 percent.
I don’t want to go there and be the only person wearing a mask. I would love to go, but it doesn’t really seem safe to me. What do you think?
– Conflict
Dear Conflict: This kind of dilemma has become an almost universal experience as we all come out of what we hope will be the start of the end of the pandemic in North America.
Each individual will need to do their own risk assessment regarding choosing to attend crowded events alongside unmasked and unvaccinated people.
In my opinion, this particular event presents a higher risk than you might assume.
A wedding in Arizona in August is guaranteed indoors, in a closed location with air conditioning and possibly fans circulating fresh air.
(According to Accuweather.com’s forecast for Phoenix in August, the average high daytime temperatures for the month will be 102 degrees.)
Since the coronavirus spreads through air droplets, which would circulate in a closed environment such as a wedding venue, this could result in the type of spreading event that would present a potentially extremely serious risk to non-guests. vaccinated.
You are vaccinated against the disease caused by this virus, and your vaccination would protect you against serious symptoms, but given the assumptions I am making and your own concerns, you may want to give a pass.
Dear Amy: “Unfashionable and Unhappy” described the pressure her friends put on her to put on make-up and make-up.
Boy, could I understand! I’ve never been into clothes, and my house isn’t perfect either.
My friends know you have to take it or leave it.
– Was there
Dear summer there: I described these friends as “lovely little bullies.”
“Unmode” must hold out.
(You can email Amy Dickinson at [email protected] or send a letter to Ask Amy, PO Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
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