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For nearly 15 years, David Deutchman – aka the “ICU grandfather” – cuddled babies in the neonatal intensive care unit and played with sick toddlers as a volunteer at Children’s Healthcare d ‘Atlanta. Her efforts to help overwhelmed parents and sick children went viral several years ago; people loved to hear about his kindness to others when they needed it most.
Deutchman died aged 86 on November 14, just two and a half weeks after being diagnosed with stage IV pancreatic cancer. His family can’t believe he’s gone, but they say they know his legacy will live on for years to come.
“Volunteering has absolutely enriched her life,” Deutchman’s daughter Susan Lilly, 55, of Telluride, Colo., Told TODAY Parents. “The most significant part was the actual time he spent with these patients and their families.”
“He has had a very successful business career, and I have never heard him speak with so much appreciation and love for what he did during his 41 years with the company, as he has talked about his involvement with the people at the hospital.
Deutchman began volunteering after retiring from a career in marketing. He found he had too much free time and wanted to stay busy. He was at a nearby drug rehab center one day when he saw Children’s Healthcare in Atlanta and came to see if he could volunteer. After some training, his second act as “ICU Grandfather” began. While families often sought him out because he was so popular, he felt like he was the one who had won the most from his time there.
“He’s said, many times, ‘I don’t know how much people realize how much more I get out of it than I put in,'” Lilly said. “(He was like) ‘You know, I get comments from families how much they like me, but I appreciate them.’”
Deutchman loved to hold babies or play with older children, his daughter said. He understood that exhausted parents and families would benefit from knowing he was there.
“The emotional support he was able to provide primarily to mothers, but also to many fathers and extended family members, brothers, sisters, grandmas, grandfathers, (was important). He was almost like a member of the clergy or a social worker, ”Lilly said. “Even the nurses confided in him.
Volunteering inspired and motivated him.
“It was definitely a new goal for him and something that absolutely enriched his life,” said Lilly. “It gave us great pleasure to see him have this impact. Why not share his love with people who could use it at their most vulnerable times? “
Deutchman has often kept an eye on babies and their families for years. If they returned to the hospital, he would try to visit them.
“He would go back (to the hospital) even if it wasn’t in one of his days that he volunteered – especially if they had to have a certain procedure,” Lilly said. “He was going to come in and hold their hand or hold them.”
When Deutchman turned 85 in November 2019, his energy started to wane and he considered stepping down from the volunteer position he loved so much. Then the COVID-19 pandemic began and the volunteer program was suspended, allowing a natural exit. Over the months, he grew weaker before visiting his doctor on October 27 for answers.
The next day he found out he had metastatic pancreatic cancer. Doctors encouraged him to start palliative care.
“None of us expected to receive such a serious diagnosis,” said Lilly. “He made it very clear to all his relatives and even his friends that he felt grateful to have lived a full and rich life.”
Before his death, Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta held a parade to cheer on Deutchman and his family.
“We appreciate the wave of support,” Lilly said.
Deutchman is survived by his wife of 58 years, Ronnie; his daughters, Susan Lilly and Jill Deutchman; and her grandchildren and great grandchildren. Lilly said she and her sister weren’t surprised their father was so popular among families at the hospital. He has always been an excellent listener.
Lilly decided to go after her father and become a volunteer emergency medical technician. She said she believed others could learn from her father’s example as well.
“Anyone can have a goal at any point in their life,” she says. “It was perhaps surprising to him how much he got out of it. Volunteering and serving others is deeply rewarding. “
An earlier version of this story first appeared on TODAY.com.
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