GACHUHI: Why the only space I will find myself in are sports pages

To people who ask me repeatedly why I chose to become a sports journalist, here is one last attempt to explain myself. I say last without much conviction; I strongly suspect that I will have to do it again immediately after I finish reading this piece.

Many people ask me this question with obvious implication that I could write about more "serious" topics. Some do not mince their words: I "waste" my talents on the last pages of newspapers

And I ask them: do not you worry about what happens on the front page? Whenever I see a splash about the 2022 elections in Kenya, I have the impression of being exposed to radiation. It's so dangerous. Why not talk about the FIFA World Cup 2022 and what we do to qualify? In times of doubt, I tried to evacuate the sports pages but I ended up getting bored so much that I developed a toothache.

No, I will not write about politics and I will not write about business and I will not write about agriculture. I'm not going to write about macadamia nuts because I'm sure I'll go crazy myself. I eat them but I will not write about them. I have already tried it and it has not worked and I will not try again. Our people say "tosha gari" when the vehicle is full. In my case it is full and he is gone. Enough

I will never leave the only pages when I'm not only allowed, but that's actually waiting for me to use a hyperbole. When I was a little boy, I read a story of Hezekiah Wepukhulu, the father of Kenya sports journalism.

He wrote that Vincent Mwenje's shot had beaten the goalkeeper only to be stopped by the woodwork. I knew that the goal posts of the Nairobi City Stadium were steel and yet there was no correction to this report. In fact, it has been repeated many times in the future.

Later, in the countdown to the 1974 World Cup, I read Roberto Rivelino's free kicks. They were grbad cutters. I knew that a bullet could not cut the grbad and yet that came from the giants of the trade, international news agencies like AFP and Reuters. And everything is gone. And so I ask: where will I get the superhuman skill needed to describe how to dry interesting coffee beans? Or how to safely preserve ripe mangoes?

I can not escape politics because it runs my life and so I have to go through the first pages after pbading all the latest fillers in Nation Sport with a fine tooth comb. But politics is boring; yes important but boring on the back of the teeth. You want some inspiration? Do you want to climb to the place where you really belong? Sport is where to be.

While I was engrossed in a book writing project, I came across something. Because it was not what I was looking for, it was all the more interesting. This is the evolution of sports journalism in Kenya. I can badure you that these smooth dispatches that you read from our journalists in Gold Coast and Moscow have just traveled a very long distance – in time, not kilometers.

Let me give you a window on how a football game was reported in 1933. It was a match between Mombasa and Nakuru. As you can imagine, the report was in the East African Standard, the only newspaper of the time because the Nation would only be born in 1960.
Here is the intro: "The visitors started and Mulholland immediately became prominent with some stuff The work, he and Atherton invaded, but it was up to the homesters to become dangerous at first, the attack ending with a blow of fire that Campbell cleared.The visitors responded with a good permission from Newsam, then Atherton went to the center and threw a shooting shot that Ramage cleverly escaped.It was the work of ding-dong for the next ten minutes, both goals being threatened, visitors ahead showing the best constructive moves. "

Sorry, I will not reprint the full report. But I will give you an excerpt of what the newspaper called "Criticism" in the end: "It was a tough, catchy match, full of hard knocks but with no hint of bad feelings from start to finish. Although beaten, the visitors were far from dishonored, struggling vehemently after their two-day trip and showed only a few signs of wear and tear over the last few minutes. "

You Judge for yourself -Even because I will not say anything anymore. But I can not help reminding me of Kisumu County versus Kakamega County or what they called themselves in 1945. The title was simple – Remington Cup Final. It was followed by the score line C. Kavirondo: 4 N. Kavirondo: 2.

Now the report: "Central Kavirondo won the Remington Cup for 1945 (the Arab and African inter-district football competition) in beating North Kavirondo in the final at the Nairobi Native Stadium on Saturday 4-2, having led 3-2 at halftime, it was a fast and interesting game, despite the fact that football was of the Cup-tie variety , kick-and-run rather than the tight and consistent game that some of the best sides of the league can display.Central Kavirondo has won on their merits. "

Again, that's all I'm doing. have to say.

Did I talk about hyperbole and get out of it? Well, that's how we do our work on sports pages. In the Daily Nation of Tuesday, April 27, 1971, I found an exciting tale about how the Young Rovers were beaten 6-0 by Black Mamba in a contest to decide the fourth team of Nairobi to take part in the national competition. super league. That's the title? "Movers eaten by Mamba." English translation of Mamba de Swahili – crocodile.

Of course, the Rovers appeared in many subsequent matches and this report simply irritated rather than alarmed their supporters and loved ones.

The leaders, Gor Mahia, received more exaggerations from sports journalists than cuts. The Daily Nation of Friday, November 19, 1976 did not think to be up to defeat the Nyundo of Mombasa in a quarterfinal of the KFF Challenge Cup, despite the fact that they were the champions in title of the league. He asked this big question: "Nyundo to strike Gor Mahia?" In case you do not know, nyundo is the Swahili word for hammer.

There was an honesty in the 1970s that was replaced by suffocating hypocrisy today. At that time, a cat was a spade and the story stopped there.
While people in Kenya are now so aware of their tribal identities that they may even consider dividing the country into many single-ethnic nations, you will certainly not read in any newspaper the equivalent of this report which appeared in the ] Daily Nation of Friday, November 26, 1976:

"Edward Wamalwa, international midfielder Abaluhya and Kenya, yesterday announced his resignation from the football club Abaluhya, and could play for the East and Central club champions, Luo Union, next season .Wamalwa, who has been playing regularly in Abaluhya since 1969, will enter the story when he joins Luo Union as no player from the Abaluhya tribe. Played for a Luo club. "

I am wary of any addiction but I am keen on hyperbole sports journalism. It gives wings to my imagination and erases the gloom of business, politics, agriculture and all that I could write. It pumps oxygen into my system. It supports me. I remembered a duel between the famous Afro-Trinidadian writer, CLR James and Denys Rowbotham, a journalist, inspired by my findings of the 1920s, 30s and 60s for the Guardian newspaper in Britain.

This was a West Indies cricket player named Garfield Sobers. I looked for my study breathless and, fortunately, I found the magazine. I just took fresh air after reaching the page I was looking for. Rowbotham had described Sobers as follows: "Nature has indeed blessed Sobers liberally because in addition to the talents and reflexes, conditioned and instinctive of a great cricketer, he has the eyes of a hawk, the instincts and flexibility of a panther apparently the constitution of an ox. "

CLR James was angry with this description, which I liked without knowing Sobers. He wrote a furious reply. He opened as follows: "Garfield Sobers is a West Indian cricketer, not just a West Indian cricketer, he is the most typical cricket player in the West Indies that it is possible to imagine. Genii are only men who carry to the extreme the definitive characteristics of the unity of civilization to which they belong and the special act or function that they express or practice. , to misunderstand Sobers, is to misunderstand the West Indies, if it is not by intention, by inherent predisposition, which is much worse. "
He added:" I strongly react against (this description) I always see Sobers, his action as a speed melon is the most orthodox I know, there is nothing about the panther in Sobers' stick, he is the most orthodox of all. His captaincy has the same measured character, one might say, clbadical. took away his people, and listened to his mother speak of her son; he is an Antillean from the West Indies. But he is a citizen of the world today. "

The edition of South I quote is dated September 1985 but the poetry in the pbadages has remained with me ever since, so I thought: only sports journalism can give me that." Sublime Staff.

This is my space, but there is more, sports journalism has the best punch lines in the world, I will borrow one to declare my victory against those who urge me to leave it. "Muhammad Ali said:" J & # I saw George Foreman boxer. The shadow has won. "