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The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant wisdom – but concise. Each week, HuffPost Women brings together hilarious reflections of 280 characters. To see this week's great women tweets, scroll down the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for the latest roundups.
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Me during the interviews: I love the challenges
Day 1: If I have to fill out a direct deposit form, I do not want it
– Alyssa Limperis (@alyssalimp) October 28, 2018
The smoke alarm goes off after midnight because I'm making a frozen pizza, it's my anthem
– Charlene deGuzman (@charstarlene) October 31, 2018
Kid: Trick-or-Treating
Teen: haunted house
20 years: party at home
30 years old: costume contest in a bar
40 years old: I do not know, maybe going to eat candy while we watch Nightmare on Elm Street? Everything seems difficult.– Kendra Alvey (@Kendragarden) October 31, 2018
You know you're bored when you want to hang up on text.
– Quinta. (@Quintabrunson) October 29, 2018
Happy birthday to almond at the bottom of my purse.
– Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) October 30, 2018
(hits the service light)
AGENT ON BOARD: "Yes miss, what do you need?"
ME: "Is Mr. Rogers … hot?"
F.A .: "What?"
Me: "Like all his contract is hot."
F.A .: "… maybe ???"
AIR MARSHALL: "Hi, I'm the air marshal, you have to stop."
ME: "No, but like to imagine."
A.M .: "… shit."– Anna Drezen (@annadrezen) October 29, 2018
Please, I need to know what Taylor Swift thinks about flu vaccines. I am at the pharmacy and I need quick answers.
– Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) October 29, 2018
If you want to know when the latest MacBook will be available, it normally takes 5 days after I've bought one.
– christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) October 30, 2018
Happy Halloween, or as we say on Twitter, dress your baby and / or your dog like Ruth Bader Ginsburg Day
– Sara B (@sara_bee) October 31, 2018
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