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Up next in the roster of tired millennial-targeted jokes is Millennial Monopoly — a deeply unappealing board game presented by a concerningly small old white guy with a monocle.
Complete with a tagline that reads, “Forget real estate, you can’t afford it anyway,” the game promises to be even more divisive than your classic Monopoly edition, which has already earned itself a reputation for being the sort of game that shatters families, alters wills, and primes couples for divorce.
“Money doesn’t always buy a great time, but experiences, whether they’re good — or weird — last forever,” the product description reads. “The Monopoly for Millennials game celebrates just that.”
Instead of investing in Park Ave or B&O Railroad while you cruise through life (probably on a fixed gear bicycle), you’ll get to spend your hard-earned influencer cash on so-called “super relatable” experiences, like a week-long meditation retreat, or a night on a friend’s couch. Perhaps your designated banker will even accept payments via Venmo.
“Adulting is hard,” the box proclaims. “Take a break from the rat race with this edition of the Monopoly game.”
It’s highly doubtful that anyone has ever referred to a round of Monopoly as a leisurely “break.” This feels dramatically less likely when the entirety of the game is a joke for which you and your friends are the punchline.
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